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Thank you for explaining. I think I understand now. I need to think about what you've said before I respond, so I can answer clearly. I don't entirely agree with you, but I don't entirely disagree either, so like I said, I need to consider it for a while.

I haven't heard the Weezer version of "Africa," but now that song is stuck in my head... My favorite use/twisting of "Africa" is in Straight No Chaser's "Twelve Days of Christmas," in which a college acapella group completely butchers the traditional Christmas carol in various ways.

There is little to no logic in prejudice. I would bet your in-laws don't even think they're being judgmental, because surely *they* wouldn't do that. *Other people* are the ones who will judge, so your children must be protected by you not doing anything people might judge. (Read the previous...

My kids were on the older end of "minor" when I started doing poly, and one of them was legally an adult by the time they found out. So I can't really speak from experience to the impact poly might have on younger children. However, through my boyfriend, I know several older teens/young adults...

I have the thread in the Poly Relationships section on here that goes into the biggest thing going on with me lately, so I won't rehash it here. I will say that that thread gave me a lot to think about, and called to my attention some problems I hadn't recognized before as well as the ones I...

My issue with the idea of replacement is that to me, replacing something implies it is faulty, flawed, or broken, and therefore isn't worth keeping. For example, I'm replacing my stove because the oven doesn't work. If my boyfriend were replacing me, it would say to me that in his opinion...

I think I somewhat addressed this in my last couple of posts. There *isn't* anything wrong with it, but I was *perceiving* it as "I can't see KC, so Other Partner is better than nothing, because all my partners are just partners, not individuals." That isn't how he was thinking of it, and I...

YAH and Tinwen, thank you for your input about the phone privacy thing. You posted this while I was writing my response to SEASONEDpolyagain. It amuses me that you and I both used the example of ice cream about this part of the situation. The part I bolded in your quote is how I felt about...

It isn't about whether he loves me "properly" (whatever that means). I consider it disrespectful to *anyone* in a poly relationship to be used as an interchangeable piece for anyone else. I *don't* want him to stay home "sulking", or stay home at all. I don't agree with the behavior of saying...

That's a tough situation. You definitely aren't wrong to feel the way you feel, because feelings aren't right or wrong, they just are. It sounds like your reaction to that feeling is to tell your girlfriend you don't want her to join the sugar daddy site. Whether that *reaction* is right or...

Yes, that's essentially what Galagirl also suggested. I do view it as his time is now free if I cancel, and he can do what he wants with his free time. I'm not sure I was seeing it as "he's replacing me on MY night" as just "he's replacing me." Sort of an interchangeable parts thing; "Oh, I...

How does being dishonest with your wife and hiding something from her help you not lose her? It's likely that eventually she'll find out about this other woman; it's hard to keep something like that a secret forever. Wouldn't it hurt her more, and make her more likely to leave you, if you...

Thank you. Yes, that's what I'm trying to do. I can often talk back to the anxiety; the problem is that I don't always listen to what *I'm* saying instead of what the anxiety is saying. That's what I need to work harder on, I think.

I'm not sure which word is correct. He seems to thrive on taking care of other people, whether physically or emotionally. I don't recall feeling neglected. He usually manages his time pretty well, and if someone has a stronger need than I do, I'm okay with stepping back a bit so their need can...

I have tried mindfulness practices. Meditation sometimes makes the anxiety worse. I used to do yoga, which worked better, but at this point I have physical difficulty doing it. I've been doing some physical exercises my ex-boyfriend taught me a few mornings a week, as well as doing some walking...

Exactly. While I acted on impulse out of strong emotion, and hadn't fully thought it through when I first left my house to take his things to his place, the thoughts going along with the emotions as I made the drive were that I didn't want to keep feeling those emotions, I didn't want to keep...

That's how it is with me much of the time. I don't always know why I feel depressed or anxious; sometimes I just do, with no apparent trigger or reason. For me, both are a matter of brain chemistry; both run in my family at least back to great-grandparents. (Probably further, but there's no way...

Thank you for responding and clarifying your points, as well as pointing out things that I said that contributed. I would say that there's a strong probability it isn't. I'm realizing through this situation that it certainly isn't healthy for *me*, at any rate. You did read that correctly...

Yes, I could, and that's a good point. That goes back to the necessity of assuming he's going to be with someone else if I cancel our date night, since otherwise, he isn't likely to be with someone else on a weekday morning. Also a good point. No. Thank you for asking for clarification. What...

It sounds like George canceled a standing date with you in order to spend a night with Gina? If that's the case, that alone would be cause for you to feel angry and hurt, in my opinion. It also sounds like George needs to work on his skills as a hinge, particularly when it comes to respecting...