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Is this a wind-up? I don't understand why you would let the guy come and move in with you and your kids. What on earth do they make of this situation and the inevitable emotional tension that's going on in their home? If you can't even put your foot down and tell your wife that she cannot just...

Of course, you are free to agree or disagree as you see fit. I'm not getting this idea from something dumb like an attachment parenting handbook or anything. I'm an academic working in a psychology department, and although I wouldn't pretend to be an expert in any child development area other...

If you are worried that their attachment is showing signs of being indiscriminate (and at their ages, most kids will have grown out of that - it's usually just present in babies) then I think it's something you need to take seriously. To be honest, I have only seen this once personally, in a 5...

Honestly, I would never want to be in a long distance relationship. At least not one that started long-distance, and would require me upping sticks at some point in the future for that gap to be closed. It's hard to tell which aspects of your situation relate to the fact that you are in a poly...

Like the others, I see no problems, ethical or otherwise with this. One of my initial concerns when Nina and I were opening our relationship was that being involved with other people would distract us from some of our life goals together. We can sometimes both suffer from what I jokingly call...

I think if it's stressing you out you could try a different approach. Instead of asking her if she thinks things are going okay in your relationship, tell her the truth, which is that for you things are NOT currently going okay in your relationship. It's one thing for a partner to be inviting...

I agree with everything you say, but the OP doesn't know where the eruption site may be, because she's never been aware of having any lesions. All she knows is it's HSV2, so that does make it a little harder to avoid contact.

Also wanted to add, if you've never had an outbreak but just tested positive for hsv2 via a blood test, you might not even shed it from your genitals. hsv2 can happily exist in your mouth, so you could potentially be able to pass it to someone via kissing. The test just tells you which variant...

I don't mean to be flippant here, but it's herpes, not HIV. It's not the end of the world. You're on retro-virals. Even if he does get it, it's not going to kill him. There's more chance he could catch it unwittingly from one of his other lovers than you when you're taking precautions to...

I meet whenever I feel ready to. Sometimes that's after extensive chats, but sometimes it's just on a gut feeling. I think I'm probably a bit more cautious about meeting people than I need to be, but then again, it's so easy to pretend to be someone you're not on the internet that I think it's...

Why not just tell your parents you are dating someone, and leave it at that? You are technically only dating him, and not her. If your parents ask to meet him, then either tell them you're not ready for that yet, or to mind their own business. At 32, you shouldn't have to account for your...

I would interpret this as her being frank that she does not desire you sexually, but is happy with you fucking her in a threesome context, and maybe her fucking you if instructed by him. I think your intuition is right that this is destined to be a V, with some kinky play with all. I guess you...

One thing I'd try to be especially aware of in this situation is whether I looked to be falling into a similar pattern to the previous relationship. For instance, are these other relationships online and all consuming like the last one? This might be a potential red-flag - when we fail to...

It sounds like you are discovering lots of new things about yourselves and each other, and that's always very exciting! I'd caution you to not get too carried away with the what ifs and imagining a future together though. Not because I'm cynical or anything, but just it's always better to let...

I'm sorry you're going through this. :( I don't think there is an awful lot you can do in this situation but to start thinking about how to best take care of yourself. In your shoes, I would give her the freedom she wants - I wouldn't cling to her or try to convince her to stay in a...

I agree with Phy. You guys need to move in together and see if you are compatible on that level before you can make the decision if all three having kids together or not. Your fears and concerns sound very reasonable to me, and not necessarily particular to being poly. I would be tempted to...

I would love to have kids with Nina sometime soon. Luckily she feels the same way. If for some reason however, she chose to have children with another partner - whether in addition to, or instead of with me - then at the very least, we would cease to be life-partners. Having kids takes time and...

The purpose of this trip is to attend an event, right? That all three of you want to attend. It's not purely a date for them. If they want spontaneity in their hookups with each other, then maybe they need to plan a trip for just them for the weekend. I think you're being pretty generous...

This whole situation sounds like a bad soap opera. She's treating you like shit, and you're just taking it. At some point, you are going to have to own that decision. But I hope you just start making better decisions in future instead. In your shoes, I'd be telling Kip to go fuck himself, and...

Stumbled across this today and thought it might be relevant to the discussion. Of course, the research focuses on empathetic parents, but I'd imagine that there would be a similar thing going on between empathetic poly partners too. (tl:dr version of the link - having high empathy can affect...