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Yes. This is clearly stuff that you do well and are interested enough in to do the work to get better at. :-) I agree very much with this. It is my experience that where people are very interested in doing well at something, they question themselves, ask if they are causing harm with it...

I think you are hard on yourself, Reverie. This is the sort of thing I questioned myself about when I was considering some kind of non-monogamy as a relationship model. I came to the conclusion that in my circumstance it wouldn't be ethical to do so. Too busy, not enough interest in romantic...

I'm sad to read that you are feeling so down about your appearance. You are a beautiful woman. Plus - no wonder you've put on weight. Lots of fun and love and caring in your life - and all the eating out and food gifts that go along with those things. I've always been a bit overweight...

I speak as somebody who is open only to monogamous relationships. (possibly relevant here but my choice about relationships relates to my lack of desire to spend the time and energy that I'd have to spend on sex and relationships if I or my partner were to practise non-monogamy in a way that I...

I'm with you on the secret keeping. A while ago my partner spent an evening with an old friend of his. During this evening, he went to a private place with his friend where they were able to kiss and fondle without anybody seeing them. He and I are in a monogamous relationship - but at that...

This all sounds really tough. I feel for you. Just picking up on some of what you have said: So, your husband lied to her. Told her he'd wait for her but instead started dating you. Then your husband lied to you. Told you he'd be monogamous with you but instead had sex with his previous...

Me too - to a point. I do have some problems with the notion that people as individuals must think good stuff and look at the world in a particular way to solve problems. That said - the idea that thoughts and previous experiences shape what we see in the world is not new and has not really...

Wow. No wonder you've not been feeling like yourself. Your prescription of lots of sex sounds like exactly what you need. Help you get through a difficult time. :) Have loads of fun.

Thanks StanleyWard. The loss was a few years ago now so I have had time to do some grieving and healing from it.

Well - neither my partner or I identify as either poly or mono. But - we do find that we are not entirely in agreement about relationships. My partner, Art, feels strongly that poly or open relationships are the right thing to do. For him it is a moral good and something he feels he should...

Poly has been on my mind a bit again. For a couple of reasons. One being that Art and I discussed it again a while ago. We periodically check in with each other to see if we are both still happy with how our relationship is going. We've had to kind of meet in the middle. Art feels strongly...

Sorry that things suck right now but you have done your absolute best to make things work with Prof. They just aren't and while it's hard times just now, I'm absolutely certain that you're making the right choice. It seems from following your blog as if you have been getting increasingly...

Keeping fingers crossed for you. Hopefully you'll be out of this time of confusion and upheaval soon. I hope the perfect job turns up soon.

With this stuff, there is disagreement. For some people, polyamory is what they are. They feel that it is an orientation like being gay. Something that they were born with. For others, polyamory is what they do. It's a way they have chosen to have romantic relationships. They may change in...

Give yourself a break. Your wife had an affair with this guy which you've not long found out about. Why would you expect to be okay with her dating him so soon afterwards?

This is great news. :D So glad you see a way forward. I've been very glad of this forum at times. Especially in the first few years of seeing my partner. He was keen to have a poly relationship and I wasn't so much. Interested but not sure. Being able to read about the wide variety of...

I'm talking about what I would do if I was experiencing something similar - situational depression because of a change in life and the reaction of a loved one to that change is something that I've dealt with. So I'm talking about what helped me. I wanted to be clear that when I was talking it...

This is brilliant news. So pleased to read it. :D

Okay - in your shoes I'd be looking for ways to regain my sense of self and work my way out of depression. In particular, ways that wouldn't make the current situation worse. So - I'm not sure what exactly it is that the Writer was unhappy about before you talked to him about poly? Maybe the...

You sound so lost, Atlantis. I hope that you can find peace and freedom from the PTSD and stress that you are suffering. I hope too that in time you are able to come back to multiple relationships. I think you handle them really well and I suspect that I'm not alone in feeling inspired by...