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  1. Q

    Extremely new to poly, married bisexual guy

    I agree with the other posters. Read up on polyamory. The biggest skills to learn are open communication, dealing with jealousy, and meeting people's needs. I would suggest that, if you find a bisexual guy, don't try to push for him to have relationship with both you and your wife. Let a triad...
  2. Q

    Hey I'm Britney

    Welcome! Enjoy your stay. :)
  3. Q

    Looking for some help

    I think it is normal. We grow up with cultural biases that may be hard to shake at times. In standard monogamous relationships, there is a huge element of competition involved to win someone's affection. It is not easy to let it go. I would not worry about your ack of desire to look for someone...
  4. Q

    Hurting over family judgment

    When I have come out to several friends, their advise was to just have an affair. Just keep it separate from family life. They said that otherwise, I am jepordizing the relationship and stability. Basically, the problem is how to have an affair discretely enough. My response is that I plan to...
  5. Q

    looking for some advice on how to handle my parents

    It is very similar to coming out gay I think. Some parents are very upset at the prospect, but after awhile, many come to accept it. (Hell, look at Dick Cheney!) So I would suggest that you keep not hiding your polyamorousness (is that even a word?). Treat it as if you were gay and they did not...
  6. Q

    Atheist View of Polyamory

    Heh. I gues I would define it materialistically. I think a big difference happens in a society's viewpoints when we have medicine and sufficient wealth to expect comfort. I think societies have different viewpoints when suffering and lack of resources are all too common. But I don't want to...
  7. Q

    I'm so stupid....

    I agree with Redpepper that your story is not an uncommon way people discover polyamory. Many polyamory discovery stories are filled with "lessons learned." On the positive side, I have heard of some poly stories where it did succeed despite an initial affair, but it was not easy for anyone...
  8. Q

    Atheist View of Polyamory

    From what I have seen, it seem that countries that prosper tend to have people who branch out in religious beliefs and become less fundamental. Poorer and repressed societies seem to become more fundamental and dogmatic.
  9. Q

    Why do people "Break up"

    I like to think that relationships transform over time. I think it gets to the "breaking" point once a relationship is forced too far down a path that goes against the real desires of the people. A big example is people who stay married even though they are growing further and further apart. If...
  10. Q

    I need some advice - Please be kind

    I think any chance of long term success will have to begin by being honest with them. Lay it all down on the table about how you feel. It is not easy going through all of this for anyone. Talk to them about ethical nonmonogamy. Let them know they are unique people and are not in competition with...
  11. Q

    Advice-- jealousy

    It sounds like your jealousy is indicating that you are feeling insecure on some level. The way to get around that is to try to enforce your feelings of security. How you do that is very individualistic. If you are the logical type, you could think abut the good times you have together and...
  12. Q

    Atheist View of Polyamory

    Yeah, I found it very interesting. Partly because there tends to be common stances that many (but not all) atheists tend to take. One example is gay rights. At first glance, they have nothing to do with atheism. However, the main reason people are against gay rights tend to be from religious...
  13. Q

    Atheist View of Polyamory

    There was a follow up to this article at Daylight Atheism. This one is pretty interesting because it addresses some misconceptions on polyamory. The 3 misconceptions are "Polyamory? That's okay, as long as <insert horrible things here> isn't going on.", "Those relationships are always about...
  14. Q

    The transgendered in the Poly Community.

    From what I have seen in the poly community, it is one of the more open and accepting groups. I think talk of transgender or transsexual may raise a few eyebrows, but poly people tend not to be too judgemental about who another person is with (as long as it is ethical). I think the poly...
  15. Q

    Bisexual, Pansexual, Polysexual...is it all semantics?

    I think gender is on a spectrum (not just male or female but all sorts of stuff in between).
  16. Q

    Religious survey

    I came from the other direction. I use to be an "apathetic atheist." As long as people did not try to push their beliefs on me, why should I care? What changed me was my grandmother sending me all sorts of Christian apologetic material. I started to read more about religion and it greatly...
  17. Q

    Religious survey

    Yeah, the compromise position is theistic evolution. That can either mean that God is more of a deist deity who set it all up and let the chips fall where they may (and he knew where it would lead). Or it can mean that God nudged evolution for humans along. The second interpretation suffers from...
  18. Q

    Religious survey

    My grandmother really wanted me to convert back to Christianity before she died. (Her health was declining pretty fast towards the end.) She would tell me that my lack of belief would have me spending eternity in hell. I know she truly believed all of this and was concerned, but it bugged me...
  19. Q

    Are there non-sexual expressions of polyamory?

    I don't think you have to be sexual to love another person. So as long as you and your husband are up to loving other people, I think you fit in the poly community. However, I think you could just as easity fit into monogamous world. I think a lot of monogamous people have "BFFs" that they...
  20. Q

    Hi all!

    Welcome to the forums!
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