Search results

I felt like writing this 'out loud' here, because I wonder if anyone else has a similar experience of self-questioning in relation to polyamory. One of the reasons why I had to back out of this forum for a year or so was that I was dealing with a lot of unexpected issues to do with childhood...

From an Argonaut You asked me (easy for you to say?) What are your needs? what a question - serves you right if I tell you serves me right if I don't two days of insanity later and now I (at least plan to) say: I would like to be your Non-Monogamy See? I want to be close enough for long...

Interviewer to Woody Allen: "What would you like people to be saying about you 100 years from now?" Woody Allen: "Doesn't he look well!"

Self-irony is a great protector against self-destruction. It's great that you can see yourself, and laugh/sigh in the same breath. It's really good for us to know what we really want. And it's really good for us to know that doesn't give us a right to it. Oh, and +1 for the "nice writing"...

Liking "feelin the amory" :) - makes me think of: smoothing the bumpy surface of life with amory paper!

:)

For sure, we're not in disagreement - I should have added that compassion isn't the same as 'giving support' either. Showing compassion for the abuser doesn't to my mind include doing so in any way at the abused's expense (since one is being compassionate towards them too) - when I wrote the...

You Forgot It In People by Broken Social Scene (the whole album's great).

Just to add, I think compassion's not the same thing as tolerance (and it's not the same thing as pity or sentimentality or indifference either) - it's compassionate not to tolerate someone's behaviour if it's causing suffering for them and/or others. So being compassionate doesn't rule out...

Thanks - good to return, somewhat changed and changing.

"Where the truth is, there had better be love!" Oh, and "If you are what you eat, then Voldemort's a unicorn..." :)

I'm inclined to say: I'm a man (mostly) and I have to have love to have sex. Of course I don't need to have love in order to want sex, but that's about the fantasy, not the reality ;). And the love I need in order to have sex doesn't need to be the "we were made for each other forever" kind of...

I've decided to reintroduce myself, since I came along here a couple of years ago, but then had to bail out to Sort Out My Life™ (and therefore put my relationship to relationships on hold) for a while. <labels alert>Late 40's, male (physically), ambisex by psyche, it would seem, and bisexual...

One of the problems with NRE is it leads to NRECD :) - the 'come-down' when the rush wears off - which can feel like a 'let-down', and so can lead to rejecting the thing/person who 'disappointed' you and going off looking for something/one new to NRE with. Personally, it was only a couple of...

If she can't tell you, it definitely sounds like she needs to talk about it to someone who's not intimately involved in the situation that's making her angry. A counsellor or a good friend. And how is your 3rd finding this? Maybe you all need to talk about it together.

Vive la similitude ! We (or at least I) live in a very digital culture - man/woman, gay/straight/bi, monogamous/promiscuous, young/old, etc., etc., etc. No sense of spectrum, probability fields, or the idea that people move around within these fields. I am at different times more (or less) gay...

Hey, Mark, I wasn't trying to correct you. I was just adding another side to the discussion. I find it helps to see that alongside the differences between men and women, we're also both more similar than we like to think we are.

I think men and women have different (though overlapping) relationships with their emotions, different 'officially permitted ranges' of emotions, and neither of them is 'right', just different. It just means sometimes men and women have to make a little more effort to make sense of each other...

And of course, many women view "their" men that way too. It's just something people do sometimes. We all need to look deep into ourselves to make sense of jealousies. There's generally a middle ground between "it's all my stuff" and "It's all their stuff."

Strange to say - I've never been in a polyamorous relationship, but I realised earlier this year that I've been (literally) dreaming about it since I was 10. So I've just been reading, chatting, smelling the air, mulling it over. Because of my 'emotional promiscuity' (all my intense friendships...