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If you have an agreement of no emotional involvement, honesty demands you explain your changed feelings with husband and partner and renegotiate. It may work out or it may not, but that was your agreement. Both your husband and your partner need to know your changed status. If you never agreed...

I was raised in a traditional Indian household, where women are conditioned to be seen and not heard kind of thing. Asserting autonomy is "bad character". I was allegedly a "rebel", but not as much as people thought. I evaded (still do) objections and rebelled only as much as necessary to follow...

I am polyamorous and demisexual AND sapiosexual AND asocial and have been known to have asexual spells altogether. Which basically means I'm single till someone I really like comes along, and then I get disillusioned/disinterested very easily so it doesn't work out and haven't been lucky enough...

Sucks that her ex blindsided you before she could tell you, but if she and her ex are on friendly terms, I don't see the problem. From your question and "I don't think this requires", I had thought you were indignant that she was expected to go on this trip against her wish because her ex was...

I am. Post above. For me it happens if I think the relationship is being taken for granted. I can also suddenly switch off (but I also don't want to fix) if I lose respect for the person - usually over ethical issues. Not sure you should tell them or even yourself. You losing interest in A...

I often get discontented after NRE wanes. I tend to not lose NRE very easily (I also don't get out-of-control high on it initially). When a partner loses NRE, I find them making less effort toward the relationship and taking it more for granted, which usually triggers the end of my NRE. Sadly...

I guess the only way to know is ask. I'd suggest beginning with reassuring that her asexuality is understood and accepted, however he still desires a romantic relationship with her. I used to be asexual, but have not really bothered to read up on it. A friend had once explained that there are...

I see you trying to talk your way around unfavorable opinions in various ways. Someone doesn't understand what you mean. Someone doesn't understand psychology in the way you mean (frankly, it is bullshit). Someone misunderstands Cam's interest. Someone misunderstands your wife's sexuality. No...

Asking for feedback and accepting it and using it are entirely different things. At this rate, 10 pages into this thread, we'll still have you describing your feelings in some way you hope we will "understand" (meaning "agree"). I don't think anyone has misunderstood you, many of us DISAGREE...

I am divorced and have sole custody of the kids with husband "free to take him on visits, including overnight, as long as there is a willing adult NOT UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF ALCOHOL to take responsibility of the child and his needs" - this is actually in the divorce petition and made it through...

So totally get this. I'd rather give up the partner than my space :rolleyes: Which pretty much leaves JaneQSmythe's suggestion as a very good one. He can come to your space or remain in his, while you remain in yours. Unless the two of you are oversized or don't sleep too close, I find bed...

On complete tangent, I live in India, which has slightly less than twice the population of all of Europe. The population counts are incomprehensible. My "small town" has more people than that. Sadly, our culture here is so orthodox that at the moment there is exactly one person openly claiming...

LOLWUT???? versus exact next sentence Creepy MAX. I have no idea why you thought a poly forum would be a good idea. You're touching a woman who doesn't like it "too much". That falls into sexual harassment more like. Your wife doesn't like it. Gets you out of the poly scope for dead sure...

I don't get where I misunderstood you. This is an issue with communication and managing own emotions in a relationship. It is an acquired skill that many end up learning as adults and find it hard (or may be handicapped by past trauma), but there are no short cuts. This is a relationship...

If it is about jealousy that he isn't with you whenever he has partners and you are at home, it will be harder to resolve. Emm made a good suggestion - that if you're always sleeping together, keep the other bedroom as a spare for use with visiting partners. That way the space the two of you...

In other news, seeking more love to fill a bottomless pit does not resolve issues related to feeling unloved. For that you need to end up working on boring things like where the need comes from, learning to love yourself, learning to recognize with feelings of being unloved as stemming from an...

Unicorn hunt alert! Neither monogamy nor polyamory are a tool to resolve psychological problems. There are also real actual people on the other end. "Childhood issues" is the strangest excuse I've heard to have sex. As someone who is heavily into this mind stuff, I assure you, if that is your...

Laundering ethics. Cheating is so much easier than being honest, but then being known as a cheater is so much harder than being a cool polyamorist... An addiction to taking the easy way and embracing every dodge in sight.

The part where both husband and friend act guilty on being asked rather than answer honestly.

I call this a narrow escape. If you didn't feel ready for a partner who was creating drama in relationships (first his, now yours, etc) have you considered that a lot of your hurt is simply ego from being overlooked in favor of someone else? About the other thing where you go through this...