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I think generally when I hear of cheating and want to use the phrase "not poly" it tends to be "that's not poly" rather than "they aren't poly" for that reason. I tend to identify the behavior as not polyamorous since generally polyamorous folk like to identify themselves with honest and...

Yeah, OKC was always just a little too much for me. I was able to make some friends and get people networked to my local community, but there were too many people just hunting and hunting for partners and that isn't how I search. Then a few people got really nasty to me about me being poly...

It's understandable not to want to come out to certain people about it, especially if you are new to the idea and still developing your identity and awareness of it. I'm more talking about friends and people you socialize with, people through whom you might meet potential connections for...

I'm completely out in my life, although I realize that isn't a possibility for everybody. And like someone else already said, I don't go looking for partners, I generally happen to become interested in friends and then see where things go or if they have a mutual interest.

I know of one geared more toward the Midwest United States, although people from other areas are welcome to it if they want to know of things going on in the area or would just enjoy seeing the articles posted. We have people in there from Washington state, so it really isn't exclusive to the...

I would start by talking to your close friends. They're the least likely people to reject you because they know the most about you otherwise. They're unlikely to be as swayed by the difference and the newness of it as a random stranger might. Get comfortable talking about it in this way...

I think a good first step is to establish what each of you want out of this. There is always the possibility of falling for someone else or falling out of love with each other. I would say, however, if she has stuck with you through as much as she has then I'd be inclined to think she's pretty...

The only advice I have to give is probably not what you want to hear, especially living in a smaller town. The more transparent you are, the easier it is to attract the type of people you want. If you are afraid to come out of the closet, I imagine any other people that might be in your area...

Oh god yes, Columbus. I'm so glad I'm in the area and have such a great local community. Cinci and Dayton areas have good communities too, although not quite as prolific and fairly heavily tied to Columbus. Columbus is great for LGBT and kink lifestyles as well.

Careful on comforting or indulging her too much when she beats herself up when you confront her with something. I've seen people use that behavior to effectively prevent their partners from ever confronting them because then they'd have to do the cleanup work of the self-abuse that followed.

Um, I don't see how Johnson's divorced family is at all equatable with a polyamorous family that has agreed to be so all together.

Poly6, have you ever tried FetLife?

You might have already done this, but be sure to discuss what safe sex means to each of you. Some people are comfortable not using barriers for oral sex, others have far stricter standards (one woman in our community will not even open-mouthed kiss with someone she doesn't have STI paperwork on).

FullofLove1052: As a daughter to parents who haven't always done the best job, there is always time to change and grow. Your daughter may or may not forgive you someday, but you have no idea how valuable it is to be able to admit you made mistakes and atone for them. You don't have to live...

This post is fantastic and I may try to use this idea to create something of a list for myself. Thank you for sharing.

Two cats here. Hoping to get a dog when we get a house of our own.

Deployment isn't over yet. That one is still causing me a lot of personal stress, but it should be at least in a somewhat better place in the next week or so.

Finding a local community was the single best thing my husband and I ever did when we were first finding our way in poly. If there is an active local group, I highly recommend trying to connect with them. Being able to relate to others on an issue and ask questions and get immediate feedback...

You say that you are willing and that you just have to get over the initial hurt. What is it that is hurting/causing you anxiety? If you are able to communicate specifically what your fears are with your husband, perhaps the two of you can work together to find good ways to manage those. So...

The only advice I give is be honest with yourself. If you know in yourself that you are not happy being monogamous, then live that truth and express that truth and let the chips fall where they may. You may lose him and the ability to parent that child, but you are losing something far more...