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nycindie... you're awesome :) I already knew everything you're saying, I just needed to hear someone state it as you did. Our marriage is not conventional, we've always done what worked best for us, not what was expected. I'm trying to let go of so many conventions, pretty monogamous ones...

1. I'm 32, husband is 34 2. We've been together for 14 years 3. I've been with my bf for about 18 months, hubby with his gf for one year 4. We are both in agreement about being childfree. Yes there is family pressure to have kids, but that's not something we give any weight too. 5. We spend a...

I was tempted to create a dummy account and post this question, but I just can't bring myself to do it. As incredibly awkward as I feel about this, I really need to hear some support and hopefully hear from people who are in a similar situation. (Private messages are totally fine, if that's...

Last Valentine's Day worked out perfectly because it was on the weekend - very easy to work time in with each of my guys. We're not big on going overboard with cards and gifts, just spending time with each other as usual. I do, however, insist on making heart shaped pancakes :P I believe I did...

Our poly relationships have developed somewhat separately, although our living arrangements are very close. It's important to me that we're all able to get along, as it's been very nice to be able to share certain occasions, like Christmas and birthdays together. We have socialized as a group...

I'm typically more introverted, although my job requires a great deal of interaction with other people. I do struggle with assertiveness and confrontation at times, but I think I've been able to overcome alot of that in recent years. I grew up with very loud, outspoken people so I think that's...

So many great questions! I'm not sure I can speak to all of them, but I'm sure you'll get some other responses :) I am wondering what is a good way to broach this topic with someone in the bible belt? () If this person is more monogamously inclined but also wants to continue dating other...

I think the biggest concern about someone who sleeps around in a dishonest fashion is mostly definitely the sexual safety of their partners. If they aren't being honest with all of their partners, how can you trust that they are honest with you?

Belleisle, I understand first getting on the forums and not quite knowing where to start. In my opinion, the man you described does seem to be having affairs with multiple women, which is not considered polyamory. One could call it swinging, although in either poly or swinging, one's partners...

Other than my husbands gf, I haven't met any poly people in my area yet. On here, however, I have been fortunate to have found many mentors. So many people who have just shared their experiences and then there's all the people that have actively supported me and so many others. Redpepper and...

I haven't read your other posts so this is just my two cents :P I agree that there can be a big disparity between written and verbal communication, misunderstandings do happen. In a post, I think it was in "Coming Out", someone made a statement about parents not needing to get so upset about...

Thanks, TruckerPete and Redpepper. :) I had no idea where this journey was going to take me. This is a hard path right now, but I can get through it. Knowing that I'm not the first person to deal with difficult family gives me hope that they are going to come around.

I'm trying hard to be thankful for the wonderful Christmas Eve I had with my husband, his girlfriend, and my boyfriend. It's hard though, accepting that my father has been ignoring me for a couple of months now. He's cut me out entirely. He refuses to have any discussions and has ignored...

I would love a big cuddle pile with my guys! We have a sectional couch and have, on occasion, watched movies with me in the middle, with my head on someone's lap and someone else gets my feet. I try to switch it up so no one gets stuck with my feet all the time. :p I've been reading the "5...

I was having a really, really awful day a few months ago so we decided to go for a walk, just my husband, boyfriend, and I. We were walking down a quieter street, with me in the middle, holding hands with each of them by my side. It's not especially often that all of us are together, but that...

I sometimes forget to take his depression into account. I haven't really seen him "down" as the medication he takes seems to do be doing it's job. I do understand that this can be a tough time of year for him and I hope that I can support him through ups & downs. I've been reading alot about...

I was looking through the primary/secondary threads, finding all the discussions very interesting but they didn't have quite the information I need. I really don't like the labels of "primary" and "secondary", but I need to use them to explain. The reason I dislike the labels is because in...

At first, it was awkward to show any affection in front of each other. I don't think I would ever be comfortable making out in front of one of them, but hugs, kisses and touching now occur regularly between either my husband and me, or my boyfriend and me. I very clearly remember meeting my...

Our friends have been completely amazing, very supportive and accepting of our partners. Our families have ranged in reaction from indifference to hostility. I find that the best advice in coming out is to be prepared to answer questions and address genuine concerns. But unless you're very...

http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/ DEAR ABBY: For the past few holidays we have had to accept the fact that my sister-in-law was bringing her husband and her boyfriend to family holiday dinners. Last year we protested, saying it was ridiculous and that we wouldn't come. (We don't want our kids...