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Oh geez. It came back! I have to admit I was slightly inebriated when I created the thread, and I'm not quite sure where I was even going with it....

I've been going through a lot of what you've been going through, as well, Freetime. One person on here said on my blog that I was mourning the loss of what my marriage was. It made a lot of sense to me. Even if you said that your wife couldn't be poly, and she was totally cool with that, it...

I'm not quite sure what to tell you on that one.. I think it's just something I have to work through on my own. The contact does seem to help though. I actually had a pretty positive thing happen last night. Jen was having a pretty rough time with a lot of things last night when I got to work...

You didn't even talk about your surprise!? Sheesh...

Hmmm... Very good post! While it doesn't apply to me, it definitely applies to the situation. One thing I've been feeling lately (lots of back and forths for everybody) is sort of that distraction. Sometimes I feel like talking about poly is eating up way too much of my mental energy. Jen has...

It's weird. I'm not really affraid that Jen is going to leave me. I know that what she and I have could never be replaced. I don't think she's going to fall "more" in love with somebody else.... But there is just this aversion to the thought of her with other men, mostly physically. Even just...

Well, I keep getting deeper. J probably isn't going to work out, due to communication etc. Anyways, Jen has been talking to another guy that I have worked with, JB. They're just talking right now, but I know she is interested in him, and he's probably interested in her. While I feel a lot...

Maybe you have to think of it from the other side of the fence too? For example, with Jen being the poly one in our marriage, I feel pretty stretched thin thinking of her having more than one BF. Different situation, sure, but I think it's pretty applicable. Not to mention, I think Jen feels...

Rita, one thing I've come across in my thought paths that really helped me was this. While I was thinking that if another came into the picture, it would be more or less a copy of what Jen and I have, that is not the case, and cannot be the case. What you and your hubby have is irreplaceable...

I'm glad I can help, man. I just went through (am still going through?) the same thing you have been, so I think my advice is pretty relevant, even if it is a slightly different situation. Either way, I'm glad that I've been able to help. It's what I like to do.

I don't know if I'm that many paces behind... I've done a lot of catching up in the last week. Hopefully it'll stay that way. I'm pretty sure it will though.

I'd say it is the consequences. That one little word can change a lot of things for many people. The people on this board toss it around a little easier, but it still has far reaching effects.

Don't worry man, no butt hurting here. I, unlike some, take the advice of others when I'm not quite sure what I'm doing. Still though, he and I have had a lot of time together (granted, it was pretty much all before the poly thing came about), so we know each other fairly well. I'm just not...

It's been a pretty good few days. Haven't been feeling too anxious, and have been feeling more like myself than I have in a few weeks. I've been talking a lot more about everything again, which definitely helps. I don't feel like I need to be around Jen as much as possible, but I very much enjoy...

It won't always be there, if your experience is like mine. There was a ton of back and forth. Just remember to talk it out, and eventually you will get to the base of your fears. That day, for me, was a big stepping stone in the right direction.

No no no, I wasn't meaning that to you. I was talking to Freetime. I wanted to convey the importance of not bottling things up, because you will have a breakdown. It's not fun.

This just happened to me, so please take that to heart. It was the scariest thing I've ever gone through. I've been talking a lot more again, and it's feeling a lot more manageable.

It's okay to cry. I've never been one to show a lot of emotion, but with my growing pains (seems like a good phrase to fit), I couldn't help it. There is a lot for a monoamorous man to come to terms with when his wife comes out as polyamorous. If there is one thing I have learned, it's that you...

There are a lot of special people here, but I don't think many are quite my caliber. Most are actually special. Me, I'm just special. Like, wearing a white helmet while riding the short bus to school, licking the windows, and telling everybody how much I love the taste of two stroke premixed...

Today has been kind of off and on for me. I've been having a hard time with not spending time with Jen, be it errands or naps or what not, but at least I know why I am feeling the way I am. I am feeling pretty empowered as far as the codependancy thing. While it still draws a lot of power from...