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Thank you for your replies. You have some very valid points. Let me start by saying , he is not a bad person. He just has a ton of emotional issues. Sometimes I do feel like I am enabling him in bad behavior. However, I realistically realize I can't make his decisions for him. I can't make him...

My relationship with my secondary is very complicated. We have been friends for 25 years. He is friends with my hubby (Primary). We are all intertwined in a social circle. Not only is my secondary a lover , but he is one of my best friends. We literally tell each other everything. However...

Yes, Anne, that is it exactly. I was speaking from a perspective of what monogomous people would feel. Some days (even after 3 years) it's still hard to wrap my head around the fact that I am poly. However, that being said, if I ever had any doubts in my mind that I am not 100 percent poly ...

He and I had a marathon phone conversation tonight. It was not specifically aimed at what happened last weekend. As a matter of fact, I didn't even bring it up, he did. He told me that what happened between him and my friend does not subtract from what he feels for me. We were able to be totally...

I think the whole 'wingwoman' thing threw me too. I invited my friend fully knowing something could happen between them. However, I wasn't prepared to push her into his arms. LOL! The more I think about it though, the less it bothers me. I just need the boundries and I'll be good to go. I'm...

You both have some very valid points. I honestly don't think he means to be dishonest. He is just not very good at communicating what he wants. He and I both also hate confrontation. This has been an issue for us the whole time. That being said, we are miles further down the road than we were...

Hello all! I've been a lurker here for a few years. I just wanted to share/vent my first experience of knowing what it's like to be in a true poly relationship. A little background first. I am a 41 yr old married female. My husband is mostly mono , although he is totally understanding and...

I have to say Caprica, in many ways your 'poly' experience sounds similar to my own. Happily married, involved with a friend of both of ours. We are not a formal triad by any stretch of the imagination, but it works so well (most days, unless me or my friend are feeling emotional then it gets...

Well i won't get too detailed , because I could go on for a bit with specifics. Mainly I want someone who understands my hectic schedule, is willing to be discreet with my friends and extended family, and is willing to keep the lines of communication open. I'm pretty simple to please. I'm...

I only see my secondary maybe a few times a month (in the good months). He has a primary girlfriend & i'm married. We talk usually once a week on the phone and occasionally email. That is enough for me until he finishes nursing school next year and hopefully moves closer. Even then, I don't...

Thanks for the replies. I've been really taking it slowly the past four or five months and trying not to make my secondary relationship more than what it is. I do love him, but in a different way than I love my husband. We don't talk every day, we don't see each other but a few times a month...

Hello there! I'm a 40 year straight female. I have been in a very stable happy relationship for 20 years (married for 17 of those years) with a mono man. In the last year and a half I have been involved in a polyamorous relationship with a long term friend of mine and my husbands. This is all...