Search results

Well, you don't spend four(I think it's been four) years looking for an OSO going to meetups, conferences, workshops, munches, etc. without meeting a lot of poly people. And I also have very good taste in coffeeshops. In my fantasy the coffeeshop I was sitting in with my Alienware laptop is...

It is a sweeping generalization, but I think that it does have at least some truth to it. If I had a nickel every time I heard of some guy dragging his girlfriend to poly and the girl ending up much more into it than the guy was, I'd be typing this message from my Alienware laptop..in...

I have a hypothesis in regards to the numbers of men and women and the perception of the numbers of men and women. Now I'd have to do a lot more research to validate it(but it is able to be validated or disproven) and it isn't gospel truth. Here are my given assumptions. You have a limited...

Good for you! I hope that it works out well for you. Don't forget to breathe! :)

Well, another day another dollar. I'm trying to feel gratitude for what I have. I have a girlfriend, a place to live(that has AC and internet), a job that is ok most days. I really am doing ok. I just wish it felt like I was doing ok. I'm feeling really stressed because I'm having to hose...

Careful, though. I've found that if you step too far outside of your comfort zone, that you have just as good of a chance as being, well, "uncomfortable" as you do liking it. In regards to hippies, a lot of the poly people I have met aren't hippies per se, but they seem to have more in...

Originally sacrifice meant something very different. As a rule, when people started sacrificing for things(like killing a dove for a deity) they did so for something. The closest thing we have today is many of the African diaspora religions(I sacrifice this cake, you *name of deity* give me a...

Ok, here's an update... I went to the gym this Friday and it was a trainer day. Even though I know that I shouldn't repress my feelings, there is something very helpful about setting aside feelings for an hour or two while focusing on something else. The hurt in my shoulders and my arms is...

Well, that's the thing. I know exactly what the deeper problem is and, as per a lot of therapists, there isn't a lot to be done about it. In a nutshell, I believe very, very strongly that my life would be infinitely easier without sex and the desire for sex(I also theorize that the same is...

TY. I am feeling better. It's just a lot to process. I think that's the part that really bothers me. It isn't that she didn't understand what I was saying, that I was obtuse or unclear. It's just that she didn't care. At all. Period. The rules of my relationship, my feelings, thoughts...

Hey, thank you(no sarcasm, seriously). That is something that I can work towards and it actually helps me to make sense of it a little more. I have to work a little harder at this part because I have always had an uneasy relationship with anything sex related in the first place. This is very...

TY. The thing that is wierd is that I want touch and don't at the same time. It's like craving something that you feel very deeply is wrong. The closest thing I can compare it to is if you were in a monog relationship and you had a crush on your best friend's SO. The want is there but the...

Well, I feel, to be honest, a little crazy. First of all, sex feels all wierd and dirty to me right now. Even the most romantic "love making" type experiences feel like sex on an alley wall with a prostitute. I feel the physical desire for sex but at the same time it repulses me. It is...

Thank you. Early in the process, when she first started circling, a friend who knew her said that she had never really been told "no" before and she didn't know what to do. And you are right. I'm still lagging a bit in my internal rephrasing(not changing the events, but changing my view of...

Well, I went to a festival in upstate New York where there was a woman that I had been talking to in advance. She had shown interest in me in the past two weeks since we had met online but I was uncertain and didn't make any promises as we hadn't met yet. I spent time with her the first day I...

I use OKC and Polymatchmaker. For me it doesn't work out that well as I don't really feel that I express myself that well on online personal sites. It just seems to be a lot harder for me to do the witty banter that I depend on to establish a good rapport.

I'm afraid that, to me, that is definitely a YMMV thing. For me, every aspect of my life pushes my buttons and boundaries and makes me grow. My workplace demands a high level of quality, my spiritual life requires that I confront my personal challenges on a daily basis, and my physical...

I was not aware of that. I now have a new reason to try to get more sex (not that I needed any more). And I acknowledge what you said, but I can't come up with a good response that isn't whiny. I am sorry.

As someone who is in the exact same position(only change wife with girlfriend), could you clarify? And for me, the main reason I identify as poly is out of necessity. My current SO is unable to meet all of my needs(and I would say that no single SO I can have will meet all or even most of...

Another thing about NRE that I think is a pro and a con. It makes everything MORE intense. The good and the bad.