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The person who directly heard what she said (I'm assuming Darling?) needs to inform the child services in your area. If it was a text message or email that needs to be kept as evidence. I know getting a government agency involved can be VERY dicey for both people with mental illness and poly...

You're having someone move into your house who has already shown disrespect for your other partners and relationships. From Yumi's description of the situation there was enough reason to suspect you might be using her a bit. I'm a stranger on the internet; I have no reason to trust you. Glad I...

Yes. Regardless of how much experience you have working with kids, taking care of kids, or taking care of adults who may be like kids, it is different when it is your own child. It just is. My mom understands this. My sister (who does not have kids) does not. It is unfortunately one of those...

Yes, if I were you I'd stick with boundaries that limited my exposure to her as much as possible. Just because he wants to be friends with her does not mean you need to be. If you like, you could tell him something like, "I'm willing to revisit this in 6 months (or however long you are...

Mmm... except for the emotional affairs that don't even involve sex, particularly if they're long-distance/online. And except for the many, MANY relationships that have started (mono or not) as friends, and then deepened into something more, sometimes before they involved sex, and especially...

So is she not allowed to have friends and family members from whom she receives emotional support or has an emotional connection? Particularly male friends?? I realize that probably isn't what you mean, so it would behoove you to figure out exactly what you do mean and where that feeling is...

Sorry to nitpick, sparklepop. I think your response is fine otherwise, but-- This is inaccurate, and you seem to use open and poly as interchangeable. Swinging, polyamory, open relationships, etc., are all under the umbrella of "non-monogamy" (or "ethical non-monogamy" if you want to clearly...

I read and responded to your husband's thread, where even in his telling of events he comes off as controlling. So I don't think we're namecalling, I think we're looking at the behaviors that are presented as objectively as possible, with the limited information we have. I'm having trouble...

I can't tell from your side of the story whether you thought you were negotiating, or whether you realized you were pushing her, justifying it in your mind by saying, "Well, I'm right, she always ends up having fun." From your wife's side of the story it seems she felt very pressured by you...

While I see your point, SC, there's a difference between judging someone (or a group) for their sexuality (or race, or gender, or anything that is part of who we are) versus judging someone because they have built their life and belief structure on the idea that another group of people is...

Somewhat like WhatHappened, I see myself as capable of being poly, in that I can be in love with more than one person without my feelings diminishing. I recognize that not everyone is capable of this. Falling in love with TGIB, however, was a surprise. I certainly never planned or looked for...

I'm dying laughing! <3! Feel better!

I'm sorry you are both in such a difficult situation. :( I have a little bit of experience with this, as TGIB was in an abusive marriage that was ending when he and I started becoming more serious (we had been friends forever, even before he met the woman he married). But our situations are...

I'd say your situation definitely falls under "special circumstances". He doesn't want to hear about sex, period. It's not about him trying to pretend something isn't happening so he feels safer in his relationship. At least, that's the impression I got. Hopefully, sometime in the future he can...

No, but if you want advice people need to be able to read your post. I can't get through it enough to tell what the problem is, so I'm unable to offer help.

It doesn't even have to be a fib about a mechanical problem. You already mentioned busy and conflicting schedules- can't you be busy at that time? It doesn't even have to be a lie- schedule some "me" time, read a book, or catch up with a friend. Just because you're in a relationship with him...

True. I tend not to use those labels either, because when I try to it turns into...

Quoted For Truth. Marcus, your response works fine for those who are able to trust their partners to act responsibly and follow through with their obligations. But as we've seen on this forum and around the world, a LOT of adults can be very, VERY selfish, intentionally or not. Sometimes even...

Okay. Thank you for answering my question. I wonder how your views on living by right versus living by permission are affected when both or all parties are responsible for children. For myself, I can't see anything as clear cut as a right v permission dichotomy, because I do not have sole say...

Marcus, have you raised children with anyone?