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I met a lovely young lady on OKC. We've been chatting and talking on the phone for weeks now, and we're really into each other. I'm getting twinges of NRE already here, and we haven't met face-to-face yet! Tomorrow we're meeting, finally. It took awhile to get together because of scheduling...

Is the constant reassurance wearing on you? Are you afraid it will make you resent him? I know I'm still trying to figure it out... dunno if I ever completely will, but life's about the journey, right?

x2 - this part is very important IMHO.

If you're still getting abnormal paps, I'm thinking the answer is yes. ...and he probably could infect someone else as well.

My wife doesn't WANT to meet any of the other ladies in my life. I'm still working on this, but I'm pretty sure once she's met one, it won't be such a big deal. In the meantime, if everyone I met assumed I was cheating because I told them my wife didn't want to meet them, I'd be hosed. :(

Yeah, I'm the same way, to a point. If I don't engage the logic portions of my brain at all, I'm sometimes a short-duration beast.

I don't think these two things are necessarily incongruous - I think perhaps she IS really excited, feels very connected, and is also scared that her friends aren't supportive. My wife and I still haven't come "out" to our friends yet, because we're afraid they won't be able to accept our...

You do realize, of course, that you're asking a man to NOT THINK ABOUT HIS COCK!? Seriously, you think that's gonna happen? Well, I'll do my best. I plan to just enjoy the way things go, and hopefully it'll sort itself out. Sex with the wife has continued to be phenomenal, if anything, better...

I had no trouble during fellatio. I attained a full erection, and maintained it. Sheesh, it's weird to talk about this in such a clinical fashion. After she left, I masturbated for ten minutes or so without much trouble, just to make sure my boys were workin.' Regarding the "Maybe it's too...

If I'm honest, this is seriously bumming me out. I actually feel a little emasculated by my own man bits. Maybe it's just not the right woman?

This could be, but how? Everything seems right to me, except for my ding-dong not working.

Well, crap. Today, things started out promising, and then as soon as it came time for entry, softness. Hard again later on, and then I lost it again. Still had fun, still like the lady. I think she still likes me, but I'm getting the feeling it's just not workin.' :(

It's not like I met her that night. We met on Saturday, had coffee and talked for about two hours, then kissed a bit. Then we chatted later that night, and again on Sunday. Monday night, we met at 8:00, had dinner, drinks, etc., and didn't skedaddle until 1:00. I don't think it's a lack of...

I tend to find myself thinking that a lot when I read Redpepper's posts. :)

Well, there was another element to the equation, of a geometrical variety. She does kinda have a teeny-tiny-vaginy, not something I'm totally used to. But I'm not on the small side, myself. If I started to go soft with my wife, I could thrust a few times, blood would start flowing again and all...

So, as I said in a previous post, lately things have been great between my wife and me, especially sexually. I recently registered for okcupid.com (amazing site, btw), and have been in contact with a few women from there. I met one for coffee. We got along very well, definitely had some...

Some very good advice here. I think RedPepper is a genuine love guru. Seriously, Red, you should write a column, if you don't already. One thing I did want to note is how absolutely important it is to be 100% clear, cut and dried with us menfolk. If you're trying to subtly intimate something...

It sounds like all the right discussions have been had, and that you have a great support network for all this, that's awesome. My wife went through a lot of the same emotions you are when I brought up polyamory. I think they're pretty standard-- jealousy, feelings of inadequacy, etc. I had...

I agree with this. Honesty is always the best policy. From a man's perspective, I'd ALWAYS rather know than not, even if I didn't like the guy.

Oh, certainly not. When I say "wingman" it's more referring to having a friend with as evidence that I'm not a psychopath or something. For me, attractiveness has less to do with societal values and more to do with individual chemistry. I've met exceptionally "pretty" girls that have made me...