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In my personal situation, what I mean is that I have been married and divorced and now I don't see myself dating more than one person at a time, but I also don't see myself committing again to a life long relationship the way I did when I was married. So I guess it means I'm poly but can't...

I'm someone whose interested in dating to find a life companion to grow old with. I appreciate it when a guy lets me know upfront that's not an interest of his. I don't see it as giving up on a relationship before it begins. Frankly, I don't care why he's not interested in a life long...

Thanks for your support, River. I still have a few tender spots to heal, but the worse pain is luckily over. I haven't found a new love yet. Am doing some work on myself (again! ;)), but I haven't given up!!

They lived together. So, unless their work hours were at odds (which did happen at times) they saw each other daily. He told me near the end of the relationship that he thought we took things too fast and that it would take time for me to "earn" my way into a primary relationship like he had...

I was introduced to poly through meeting someone online. He lived a 7 hour drive from me and had an existing partner when we met. (He was the hinge of our eventual V relationship) We talked reg. on the phone (weekly) and I drove the 7 hours to meet and spend time with them a couple of times...

Cherry is hurt about someone you USED to love? I don't think this bodes well for eventual acceptance on her part of your interest in polyamory. If she can't handle past relationships without getting bent out of shape....how would she ever handle a current relationship with someone...

I'm a 56 year old female whose been "dating" off and on for the past 9 years. The men have ranged from ages 34 to 64. The 64 year old is the only one who had an equal sex drive to mine. The rest had a lower sex drive than mine. When I was in a poly relationship (our guy was at the hinge of our...

I ended two monogamous marriages and remained "friendly" with my exs, but didn't do things together anymore as "friends". With my poly couple when I broke up with him (she and I were friends...he and I were a couple) I cut off all contact with him and ultimately cut off the friendship with her...

This was the arrangement I had with my former poly couple. She is bi and he is heterosexual. I am a heterosexual female. He and I got together as a "couple" and she and I developed a good friendship, but nothing more.

When I was in a poly relationship, our guy was the link between us, the two females involved with him, getting to know one another. He and she were the established couple. I was his new female interest. We were in a long-distance relationship. After asking me, he started to include her on a few...

I think this was related to the issues of "time". If there had been an interest/willingness to do things together there could have been more time spent with one another. When I was in a relationship with the male partner of an established poly couple, I spent time with the couple, family, etc...

Mettwo, I'm with you on this one. If he could manage to set things up to go to a concert and not be too worried about leaving wife and baby at home.....he surely could have managed to come see you as you asked. My former husband would go on business trips a week at a time when we had...

I think some of the key words used by your friend/lover were "doesn't want to" and "can't". To me..."can't" is the "victim" in co-dependency. I think her honesty is "doesn't want to." She chooses not to do anything different. It is "in her hands" in spite of what she claims. I, too, have...

I can see where it would be hard to believe what she tells you, since she and her husband aren't honest with one another. I think this would also add to a sense of insecurity on your part. I'm having a difficult time seeing where either one of them is really taking what you want and need into...

I'm having a hard time seeing how you and your boyfriend have been "polyamorous and have been for 4 years". You talked about how you don't want to just have sexual relationships with no emotional connection, and how you've treated sex with others "cheaply" so as to not "betray" your boyfriend...

My $.02....For someone who hasn't been willing to follow many of the limits and requests you've agreed on in the past do you really think he's going to be willing to follow these requests???? And.....even if he says he will, do you feel you can trust him to do what he says he'll do?? If he...

This is exactly what happened in my situation! I was dating a guy who was part of a poly couple (I'd never heard of polyamory until I met him online). I raised concerns at the very beginning about how did one find time to fit everyone/everything in in terms of the relationship, children, jobs...

I had gone out with a guy a few times and then told him about my poly relationship with someone else. He thought I was trying to dump him with this wild, made-up story about something called "polyamory." It was quite the opposite. I was very attracted to him and thought he should know about my...

Have you discussed "putting a move on her" with your husband? Is he aware that you're having these kinds of thoughts/feelings? He might be able to help you sort through some of this. Or better yet...how about discussing the possibility with her rather than "putting a move on her" to find out...

You've got my vote on this one! :D