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"Poly" wasn't the only issue here. These "unicorns" were young, in their 20s, often an idealistic age, not always very realistic in terms of what the world "should" or "shouldn't" accept. (Nothing wrong with idealism, per se, as I'm still called "Pollyanna" at 56 years old, but it has come at...

Well, I'm one who definitely got burned on this concept of infinite love; love begetting more love when it comes to poly. A guy I met through an online site (Dave) introduced me to the idea of poly. I'd never heard of it before. At first I was like, "No way! Fine for others. Not for me." One of...

Good to hear you're alive and well! I knew I hadn't seen you posting much lately and was hoping all was well. You've given lots of good feedback and support to many on here, myself included.

He is having trouble trusting you changing your mind about wanting babies, considering the timing??!! WTF??!! What about him being able to trust himself changing his mind about wanting babies considering the timing, e.g., just 2 months into a relationship with a new gf??? :mad::rolleyes: Also...

I have never been one that listens well to high pressure sales people...or fundamentalist "fire and brimstone" styles..or "snake oil" type presentations...no matter how potentially wonderful, unique, or outstanding a "product" may be. This is how your style comes across to me. I get into that...

My ex-poly couple had "their" bed. She suggested that he and I sleep in it one night when she was working and they hadn't gotten the room ready that I was going to be staying in. I would not have felt comfortable sleeping there had she not known and approved. A second time she suggested it when...

First of all Cat, I'm sorry you're having to go through this. You did mention concerns about this couple that when they met with you they had an "It will all work out", attitude, but not much in the way of details to back it. At least you're getting a prime example of how they cope with...

How wonderful that you care! I've been a third person coming into an established relationship and just knowing the other partner was concerned about my feeling welcomed and comfortable was reassuring. She left it to our guy, however, to create the specifics of that situation since he's the one...

For me...."growth" implies an "increase in". There's no guarantee that "stretching" one's self to "grow" will create "increase" in one's life. It could also result in a rubber band effect of snapping...thus lessening one's capacity/abilities...or in this case the "sacrifice" that Mono talks...

Let's be bottom line honest here. Of COURSE dynamics are going to change when adding another person or the amount of time with another person. HELLO! There are only 24 hours a day. I'm admittedly currently a bit bitter because my guy all of a sudden decided he didn't have time to commit to...

What "IThink" says........:D

I can so relate to this issue. I was told over and over I wasn't to be in a "secondary" role with my couple. I said I never wanted to be in a secondary position. They were a couple. Then he and I became a couple. (There was no plan for her and me to be involved as a couple. I'm hetero, he's...

My guy has interest in historical events/places/cultures, etc., that are rather obscure and difficult to find information on. He HATES doing internet searches. I rather enjoy it. I will sometimes do an internet search for him and print copies of the articles I find to give to him to read. He...

My primary love language used to be "gifts". But for me, a "gift" could be a pretty stone or an autumn leaf that my love saw that made him think of me. I actually didn't want him buying me gifts so much as just some little thing that reminded me I was in his thoughts throughout the day...

This forum has been a life saver to me when it comes to polyamory. I had read lots and lots of books and articles on it....but this forum gave me exposure and information about poly from those who are living it, or considering living it. That has been invaluable. It's not like I can find lots...

Well then....let those who like "short and candied posts" read the short and candied ones! I'm rather fond of in-depth posts, and as far as I know a vote hasn't been taken to determine what "most" prefer??;):D

I went to tons and tons of Christian Sunday school classes...and never learned this one. Thanks for sharing!

So Lucy says she wants a poly lifestyle. Where's her sense of compersion? I'm not saying she wouldn't have some feelings of insecurity, but the idea is to work through them, not avoid discussing anything that triggers insecurity. I'm wondering if you're afraid to set a firm limit with your...

Well I'm not sure this will be helpful....but it's truthful. I was the "outside" person in the poly relationship. "They" were the initial couple. I wasn't supposed to be a "secondary".....but he burned out...got overwhelmed...and now I'm the one left out. He's still with his original partner.

I'm no longer in a poly relationship, but the one I was in: She: Poly, extrovert, He: Poly, introvert, Me: ??, introvert It was interesting though because on the surface she appeared to be the introvert as she was much quieter in social gatherings, and he much more socially...