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Knowing that I'm not being included in discussions about time or activity commitments of any type, e.g., work, play, etc. If I want time with our partner, I ask him...then he asks her what other commitments they may or may not have. I would expect that he would talk with her about it because...

Kind of an aside. I am soooooo TIRED of people text messaging someone else during a date....poly partners included! (unless there's an emergency) I see no difference between this and just walking in and interupting someone's conversation implying your own agenda...or your wants and needs...are...

Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Sage. I came into an existing poly relationship. I told our guy that I did NOT want to be a secondary. He said he didn't want me to be one either. This sleeping situation came up for the first time the other night. Prior to that he had been trading off...

Just my $.02....as a mono in a poly. I don't think I'd ever do it again either if this current relationship doesn't work out. It's too complicated. As it stands right now I'm trying to decide if the compromises I make in not having the kind of time and attention I'd like with my poly partner...

I successfully moved to the area where my couple lives and have been staying in the spare bedroom in their house. Overall, things have been going pretty good! We've had some misunderstandings in terms of balancing out time and attention, but have been able to work through them so far. Our guy...

I'm with you on this one Lemondrop. I could do without the religious bent, but I think the information is worth overlooking that aspect if it doesn't match one's personal belief system.

Well my schedule for moving has been changed a bit. Things were getting too hectic for me in terms of packing and managing everything else I needed to take care of. I didn't know how I was going to get it all done in time. As I shared... with a history of Chronic Fatigue I have to pace...

http://www.5lovelanguages.com/learn-the-languages/the-five-love-languages/ Words of Affirmation Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind...

Gary Chapman discusses this sort of thing in his book "The Five Love Languages". How we experience "love" can vary from person to person, just as you've noted. Rather than "manipulation" I look at it in terms of giving a "gift" to someone. When I select a gift for someone else, I get them...

Thanks RP. I appreciate the wisdom and support you share on this forum.

Thanks RP. I agree that if I were to stay it would be too much, too fast. The thought of living with them on a full time basis as being a "positive step" was more in response to Ariakis' comment about not seeing me in a "secondary" position at this time, but as them "fitting me into their...

Maybe if I was going to live with them on an ongoing basis it would seem like a positive step. Being able to be with them throughout the daily and weekly routine might not make specific "couples time" seem like such a big deal. Time together would just happen as a part of the routine of making...

And just where is it that you see them putting me into their life other than staying in their spare bedroom until I find a place to rent???? I'm not seeing where there's much time to develop a relationship between he and I. The only "NRE" we've had from my point of view was spending two nights...

Thanks for caring marksbabygirl. I could use a good hug about now:)

I'll be moving near my couple in 4 days. Actually as it turns out I'll be moving into their spare bedroom until I can find a place of my own to rent (should be no longer than a month). I was going to try and rent a place from looking at them online, but then decided that was a bit risky not...

I wouldn't assume that Bree is a poacher. She might just be really confused about a person and situation she's had no prior experience with, and few family members or friends who can give her some guidance or even just a listening ear. Until meeting my guy online, I'd never heard of polyamory...

Glad you joined us! Lots of good information and people on this site!

It's hard to believe that in just 16 days I'll be seeing my couple....on a regular basis! Damn....I'm so excited! :)

Well luckily I don't see myself as an unreasonable or demanding person. In fact, I'm more likely to go the other way....think more of others wants and needs and not speak up and ask for what I want/need. I don't want to be at that end of the continuum either as that's not healthy. So, I'm...

As corny as it may seem, I recently got "ordained" through an online church. The ordination isn't attached to any specific denomination, belief system, etc. I can refer to myself as "Rev. Dragonflysky" or even "Goddess Dragonflysky".......or any number of titles. Anyhow, many States legally...