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I know in my heart and my soul that I am poly. But I don't know how to handle the pain that's associated with it. This last one has been the worst... his reservations because of me being married brought it to a screeching halt... I don't even know where to start.. or finish.... I don't even...

Thanks all.. after some discussion, he doesn't feel that he could be a secondary. So we are just going to enjoy what we do have together in a low key way.. i.e., not out in the open with our circles of friends. He does have an emotional attachment, but he doesn't want to really attempt to...

First guy..J.... while hubs was kind of going through the issues of things we backed off.. and his feelings were never as strong as mine were, which I was okay with.. I knew that from the start. Then he got a g/f and she moved in with him in June. He's currently deployed with hubby. And...

Thank you, I'll print out the secondary thing for him, and discuss it more when I see him next. All I can do is offer him the info and go from there... :)

Been a while since I've posted here, tried searching but couldn't find quite what I was looking for, so I'm making a new post. I recently met an amazing man. It started as flirting, and rapidly progressed. There is huge NRE fog right now, and I'm trying to look through it. Hubby knows...

Thanks everyone! I'm going to link this to him. I wasn't sure how to answer him, I couldn't quite sort out the thoughts through my head, but I know how I FEEL, but some very good points were brought up here. NYCindie, a few things have changed and others have stayed the same. He did get out...

Thanks!! I am also hesitant to discuss them for the same reason. However, in discussing our rules/boundaries, etc., he insists that he wants to know everything. I will do so, if that's what he wants, but I really don't think that it's best, for how I know it affects him.

My hubby brought this up, and I know how I feel, but maybe not how to express it, so was wondering how others deal with it. He says he feels a lot of jealousy when he sees my desire for other people, that it doesn't make him feel as special, because I don't show as much desire for him. But we...

Sheesh, I can't believe it's been a month since I've posted. A lot has happened, and I think it is good! So, with hubby on the C front. He's still not sure what his feelings are. He did want to explore them a little and we discussed instigating something with C. So, we planned a little...

For the record, my desire is not for extra sex, though it comes with the territory. I know I could have my fill from you whenever the need arises, so it's not that I need MORE. It's the freedom of being able to, if I feel the connection, that gets my "juices flowing" so to speak. That you are...

I know he mentioned it in his thread as well.. but he has been having some ebbing and flowing emotions with one of his friends, C. I've always assumed he was somewhat bi (Drew), even if he didn't admit it, and he's beginning to also start wanting to explore it a little more. He's still not...

Sorry I've missed all of these posts. I haven't been on much as I was out of town for a couple of weeks and before that there wasn't a whole lot to discuss. We've been going to counseling and it's been up and down... things definitely have been looking up since I went out of town, however...

Well, all of this makes me grin ear to ear. I'm very proud of you babe, for taking the time and thought to look inside yourself and your past, and present, feelings. At the same time, I'm still hesitant. I'm afraid it will backfire, like it did before. I don't want to hurt you again, even...

He doesn't feel like he's making any progress, talking about it or not talking about it. He understands the concept of Poly, but he can't seem to stop being illogical when he thinks about it. It's always negative thoughts. He gets angry, depressed.... and this is without any active poly...

I'm wondering why I have to be the one to defend myself, to apologize for saying my feelings out loud. I say them with as much care as I can, but it's still not good enough. Why is it me that's wrong? It doesn't matter what I say, it's always the wrong thing.

Ariakas - He drinks beer, and usually on the weekends, though occasionally during the week if the next morning is his to sleep in (we alternate who gets the kids each morning). Although he does tend to drink a pretty large quantity on the weekends, and there have been a few periods throughout...

Thanks everyone. Mr - Thanks for the hugs, they are appreciated :) Back to your scenarios, I think I would enjoy if A) AND B) happened, how cool would that be? Nycindie - Yes, we are still going to counseling. In fact we went today, and today was the first visit I felt that maybe made some...

I'm feeling angry and hurt right now. I know hubs has been dealing with those feelings as well, but for different reasons. I'm feeling like I'm being attacked for being who I am. I feel like I've done everything in my power to make this easier for hubby and it's not enough. He still feels...

Still hanging in there.. still having ups and downs. We have been going to our counselor weekly. I don't know whether we are making progression, but we at least have a common goal. We both want hubby to be able to accept it. It makes me happy that he wants to try, for both of us. I...

I feel like things are continuing to get worse instead of better. I don't even think it's about poly anymore. I think poly was just the catalyst. We had another big fight this weekend. Nothing poly related has gone on in about a month. The last time I saw J was when hubs sent him over...