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I've been listening to good music all day, singing and dancing around the house with the kids. :) Oh, and my new knee pads and outdoor skate wheels for a parade this weekend came. J is coming back from leave today too. It's just a good day.

Darcy

I don't think there is anything wrong with it. There's somebody for everybody :) I personally don't have a preference. I used to be heavy 100lbs over weight from what would be considered the top end of my normal bmi for my height. When I married my hubby, he was super thin. I had...

Thank you, Cindie, for your input. It's very much appreciated. I'm hoping by being myself, and showing hubby every day how much I love and appreciate him that he will eventually grow more comfortable. That while so many things have changed, the foundation of what we are hasn't. We are...

Ursula

Yes he is.. he reads occasionally.. and I send him to read responses that I find pertinent :)

Hi RP, I feel like we have a lot of the same requirements in what we look for. For me, a lot of it is about that connection. I'm struggling with that right now too. I don't want to be stalkerish, but I like to know what that person is doing. I like the communication. I like to be contacted...

I don't think it's so much the fact that he was or wasn't filling all of those needs before. I don't think I related to what those needs were. I've always been happy. Every day we are together I love him more and more. He's an incredible man, and he treats me like a queen. Before we met...

mannequin

Hi SallyJay.. and welcome! I'm pretty new here myself, just started poking about the poly thing about 5 weeks ago. It's been an amazing, albeit stressful, and emotional journey! I've had some of the same setbacks you have granted my OSO is a single male so that's one less person to have...

As always.. love your posts Charlie. :) Thank you.

Since our whole adventure started I've felt at home with the poly thing. It feels natural and a part of me. In my intro I said that I don't feel like my hubby is lacking anywhere.. I think he's perfect! What I don't really get and what I can't explain is that J brings something different to...

Still here.. still hanging on! Another week of ups and downs with J. I've been trying really hard not to have expectations, and it worked well for a few days. My roller derby team had a karaoke fundraiser Saturday night, he surprised me by showing up and stayed the whole time, even sang a...

Okay, *sigh* we are all back in a good place for the moment. As long as I can keep my crazy hormones in check. So, nycindie, I'm taking your advice and enjoying it for what it is, for as long as it's here. Thinking positive, positive, positive!

You have a very valid point. It's not quite over. We had a misunderstanding, and I thought J was being disrespectful, which I don't think I deserve. It wasn't so much because I can't mold it, though you are right, that I am struggling with that. More of the disrespected feeling. It did get...

and just like that... it was over. I'm actually ending this. I'm not strong enough to go through all of the questions, and not knowing. I don't know that J knows what I really want, and I don't think he really wants to fill that roll. Maybe someday, somebody will come into our life that...

Okay, wow.. big steps made this weekend I think. I'm feeling the NRE coming on big time, mixed with guilt, pleasure, normalcy, awkwardness, happiness... J came over last night as planned, it was a really long week. Our communication through text isn't very efficient, and I wasn't really sure...

Charlie, your words are amazing and so true. I cried reading them... feeling the love you have for RC and CF. I feel like my heart grew ten fold in the few minutes it took me to read these two pages. It's such a wonderful feeling, and I hope that your words reach many, including the two men...

I feel like I'm writing a lot to myself here, but that's what journaling is about, right? So many uncertainties here at the beginning of this journey. I don't know if it makes it easier, or more difficult to open the door before the emotions really start flowing. Hubby and I had all of the...

We're still a mix of emotions here. Hubby did tell me that he wants me to not hold back, he wants me to put everything into this, and he will work on the things he needs to cope with, while communicating still. Our boundaries are in place and he is content with those. He told J the same...