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This is what I was thinking... A totally strange phenomenon, why on earth would people do this kind of thing... :confused: That makes it difficult to answer this question even, because to be honest if somebody started trash talking about my partner to me, it would feel pretty absurd. What do...

To me it sounds like an open relationship would suit you better than swinging, i.e. both of you being able to pursue sexual/emotional relationships separately rather than as a couple. It is understandable that he would feel like it's imbalanced or unfair or that he would have better chances if...

Way to go in expressing yourself. I am sure in the moment it must have been intense, but it seems it was perhaps good that it came out and you didn't have time to convince yourself out of it.

Good stuff. Take care!

Thoughts I had (you don't need to answer here if you don't feel like it). :) How do you feel about Ella? Is there love? Or something that could be going that way? What kind of things do you like about her? You had a specific situation prompt you to start the relationship; what kind of reasons...

Oh that totally sucks. I mean, I am sure he has his reasons and he's gotta do what he needs to, but he's basically unilaterally changing really important and big terms of your relationship.... :( I wish you strength to get through this one way or another.

any idea what has happened to the thread I started maybe 2 days ago? It has vanished altogether... Can that happen due to a technical fault, or was it removed? (And if so can I ask why?) I'm disappointed because I put a lot of thought into creating it and also there were some really interesting...

Coping with studies&work. Thankfully I really enjoy my studies and I also enjoy the food I can buy when I get paid for my job. ;) I am seeing a pattern of behaviour and I'm writing to get it clearer and also so that maybe some solutions could be teased out of it. My energy levels vary and...

It was sooo funny to read this because I'm experiencing same thing for the first time, too! :eek: :D I don't know her at all, though, but I'm finding her attractive for she seems very intelligent and passionate and she has a pretty non-normative style for a university teacher. Definitely have...

One thing I'd like to point out that feelings don't automatically have to lead to something. You should still ask yourself what it is that you want to do. You will have choices. I don't see any reason you couldn't be friends after having sex. I don't see any reason why you couldn't be friends...

I am not in a similar situation to you, but I just want to comment on this. Do you think that was right? If you have a plan with a platonic friend to watch a movie on Thursday, but then your primary partner tells you he wants to watch a movie with you on Thursday, do you cancel on your friend...

I didn't have time to read all the responses but I wanted to comment on this This isn't right. With this kind rule in place, the poly relationship will most definitely not work! For it to work you need to be able to communicate with K. You need to be able to tell her how you feel. For you to...

That is lovely :)

I actually don't see the first kind as drama at all. Directly but kindly expressing emotional stuff, showing emotions, alone doesn't equal drama (and it is some chauvinistic bs that it is seen that way in the first place). It actually prevents drama, since as you say:

The accident sounds awful, I am happy you are alright! Btw, I just spent like 3 hours going through your tumblr... Your taste is soooo excellent! :p

I think this is a really sensible and loving way of looking at it. :)

This is something I've been thinking about. I often feel that I can give quite good feedback about stuff, but with some issues I've actually felt that I maybe shouldn't comment because some of my motivation might be affected by my own feelings. It may not be even that I want a certain outcome...

A practical suggestion: you might try skype with web-cameras for better communication?

Wow, PhilosophicallyLost, I feel for you. I am similar to you in that I am an introvert, and I also have two extrovert partners. However, our situations are different in that both of your partners seem to be acting pretty selfishly. I struggle with the time management even with two non-selfish...

I find it funny that a thread where a person asks about people's rules has turned into a lengthy debate over whether rules are needed. Why not just skip if you have nothing to add about the topic? :) I don't use the word rules, but I do have expectations from my partners, and I aim to act the...