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My personal variety I think these are important! For my own list, I would not refer to mono "rules" for poly, as poly seems to me to cover a strictly larger field. I also don't think having the same goals is mandatory, in my experience it is more about making the goals compatible. My...

I think I understand, but do you really think there will be that much of a set of stereotypes loaded if we agree on some foundational principles in addition to the basic romantical non-monogamy? One of them here is exactly the anti-sterotypical "Your poly is not my poly", and I can't live poly...

I have trouble with your logic here for one very simple reason: The word "polyamory" wasn't there, it is constructed, and therefore we CAN in fact ask other people to please use some other words. Which we can not with, e.g. multiamory, which is not a hybrid. It is perhaps more clear if we apply...

I really fell this "exercise" can be worthwhile for you, DD123. Even in a mono relationship, the relationship could improve if there is some balance in how outgoing you are etc. That feeling is perfectly natural, but why not start out looking for friendship, for example? Or maybe even just a...

So, then: Because of the fluidity, you just let basic concepts, lik "democracy", "energy", "uniform convergence" (mathematics) etc flow along and mean whatever the speakers feel they should mean at any instant? Happy communications, then! ;) Edit, to be more precise: Language changes, more or...

The Creator's view A little background info, from www.patheos.com Here it is:http://original.caw.org/articles/bouquet.html Just for the record, I don't subscribe to the Ravenhearts' religous ideas, but when someone invents a new word, I think it is good to follow the intentions when using...

Maybe "multiphilia" would go in the direction of "Casanova syndrome"? Like with "polyamory", there's no "correct" meaning in hybrides, they are new creatures..

He said: His interpretations tells me he hasn't "got" it the way I think he would if he had seen it through "poly eyes", but I think we should be careful about declaring his interpretations "wrong". Saying he is not "mentally poly" was a way of - tautological, as you point out - hinting at...

Is it OK for you if I say that what you write to me indicates you are not that much poly, even mentally? I believe for most "mentally poly" people, ignorance isn't bliss at all. To the contrary, and when we choose to be ignorant, it's often just because we don't have the capacity to relate to...

Important and useful, I think Agreed! While this kind relationship enumeration may seem abstract to some, I think it is important and potentially very useful to consider all the relationships involved, and something I could do much more myself. In Vs, the dynamic of all three together is, in...

Why polyamory is wrong ;) On a somewhat more serious note, that linguistic hybrid 1. Guarantees that nobody can say what the term "really" means. There is no such meaning. It is a construction, and the meaning is up to us users to decide. 2. Makes room for more "proper" non-hybrid terms...

Why would you not use "multiamory"? One last question: Why would you not use "multiamory"? In practice, we do the same things, have very like views etc. I think it would be much easier if we could agree on some basic foundational things, and using "multiamory" as the more general term would...

Guess you feeling is wrong. I think I was the one who triggered it, and it was about foundations, basically. Exploring common ground. But not exclusively.

That there are disagreements about a definition, does not mean we just have to accept everything that is asserted about. Rather to the contrary, disagreement may force us to be more clear about what our take on it is. To take an analogy: The initials of the former DDR meant "Deutsche...

I guess we have different sense of aestethics. To me, I have had more than enough of the "beauty" of that sloppyness and all kinds of wreckages following from it. I have spent enough time trying to help sorting out the consequences. And there is no way I will associate myself with that mess...

Your feeling is not correct. You didn't mention how you think about the last, and less agreed about, part: The issue for me is, do we want to regard these as crucial defining characteristics? I do, if for nothing else, then simply for practical reasons. I want to work with something that has...

YES! Think that's very good - in my mind close to mine really, but not so prone to misinterpretations. And more "relational" - that's all for the good! Thanks!! :)

It's not about emotions and needs being met, really :) I get a bit frustrated here at times mostly because of two things: 1. When someone says something that doesn't seem to make sense, there is often preciously little effort invested in finding interpretations where it does make sense. When...

Why relax on the ordinary use of the word? Lots of sense. But I suggest we call that minimal thing something else, like "multiamory", which would be pure Latin, or "polyerotics", which would be based on Greek. By the very hybrid nature of the word "polyamory", it is a construction with an...

Sure, got any suggestion? You see how bad I am at finding words conveying my intention..