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Thank you nycindie, your response has been helpful! I think I will show him this thread. As you say, we need to talk - seeing him tomorrow so will make time for this. A wash of calm has come over me - honesty feels good, simple really :)

Hah, writing stuff down certainly helps me get my head straight - should have done this months ago. Came to the realisation that essentially all my worries stem from 4 things: 1) The Cuddler is 100% the love of my life, he is the man I will have a family with and he takes precendence. I need...

Oh and also, I have less of a clue as to what I would want out of a polyamorous situation than ever before! I love the sanctity of the relationship I have with the Cuddler. We have big plans for what we'd like to achieve out of our life together "primary" stylee. I'm scared though, because I...

It's been a long time, so I thought I'd do some writing... Things have changed on some fronts. I am now in a serious relationship with the Cuddler. Things are wonderful! I met up with the Geek a while ago which was really nice - a lot less awkward than I feared. I am more comfortable loving...

Hi Vee, Hi Lexa - nice to meet your acquaintances! :)

Now all I can do is think about tea and cake! May have to do baking tomorrow... :D

Thanks bassman! Seeing that people enjoy reading this has inspired me to write again today and it helped me - thanks again :)

Well, what's going on for me now? I found myself really missing the geek. I was recently driving my old commute back to my old home with him for my studies - it made me realise how much I would love to be able to spend some time in the past. I suppose what I mean by that is I would like a few...

This week so far... Well this week I've had an amazing time with the Cuddler. Everything is so fantastic at the moment (you guys call it NRE) although given that I've known him so long it is different energy to anything I've felt before. Utter, sheer, fantastic bliss. Had a lot of crap going...

Thanks trueRiver. I did know this, which is one of the reasons it appeals so much I think. Just need to actually go...I'm a fantastic procrastinator!

I'm resurrecting this old post to say hello! I can competely understand your situation, if I had stayed with my previous lover I can imagine I would identify very closely with what you said. I have to say that I am glad I didn't end up with preconceived notions of what would work - I feel I...

I have become increasingly interested in joining my local Quaker meetings recently. The reason being that I can see how it will help me to achieve my aims in life. I feel polyamory promotes the same. For me, they are very interlinked. I certainly do not identify as Christian though, and wouldn't...

Lots of faithless & postrock :)

So, I am so completely 100% in love with 'old love' (really must think of some good names for these people!). It is a comfortable, familiar love. It doesn't have the neon flashy lights of other relationships I've had. It has deep trust, affection, familiarity, respect & attraction. I want to...

:D Well if you're ever in the UK, let me know. In the mean time, we're lucky to have this lovely resource! Look forward to getting to know you better. I wonder whether most of us here 'think too much'...for me, I'm on a quest to understand myself & my place in the world. It's hard not to think...

The problem with sharing all this is that I have so much in my head that in my 'steam of consciousness' when I'm writing, I seem to miss out important things. For instance, it sounded like the only reason i didn't pursue my colleague was that he was in a monogamous relationship. This is...

To bring you up to where I am now, there is more to add. A few years ago, I got back in contact with an old love. I call him that because I have loved him from the moment I met him, however for many reasons we never persued the physical attraction between us. He got on well with my now ex; no...

Tonight I just feel the need to offload about my most recent experience of relationships. There is a lot of truth to share! As I said in my introduction, I came out of a relationship quite recently - about 2 months ago. The relationship lasted a good number of years through many turbulent...

Hello everyone! :D I'm very new here and to polyamory. I have many, many thoughts swirling around my head which need to be thrashed out. I find writing helps to clarify what's going on up there, and always find that talking things out helps hugely. Please be patient with me though, I know I...

NYCindie, I find this thread very interesting. As a complete novice, making my own rules, not adhering to the societal norm, it's helped me to think more about what might work for me. My point of view? To be honest, I think I'm a bit of a relationship anarchist. In practice, I don't know that I...