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Monogamonster I made up this term in this context after PolyGuy began to express what sounded to my new-to-poly ears something like fears of the "boogie man." Seeing me as someone that had only a mono past, he expressed concern that I might be seduced away from an openness to be in...

Here's a few things that people can take away from this that aren't scary. 1) If you have multiple (new) partners, (or exposure through your partners' partners) keeping your immune system strong by taking care of yourself is a good idea, because you will be constantly exposed to HPVs, which is...

No, I don't have any definite info on this. I'm seeing studies (we mostly have the Johns Hopkins, I believe) that link these to higher alcohol consumption as well as to tobacco use and seeing that they are based on increased numbers of diagnoses (always problematic as testing rises) which...

No, we aren't. I just didn't want people to get the impression that if they don't see sores, they are ok.

Yes, ok, maybe (though I think infection of the lungs is still extremely rare). I think the studies showing a strong link between smoking and HPV are more likely on the right track. It seems likely that smoking reduces the body's ability to fight off the virus. It also seems likely that this is...

It's a little scary. I think I'm more scared of anal sex now that I know this causes anal cancers and that it wouldn't normally be caught in testing and that the treatment is awful, etc.

We should make it clear that the HPV that causes warts are not the same strains that cause cancers. Therefore, you won't see evidence of those types like you do with the wart causing ones.

Yes, but very rare and almost certainly bi- and gay men. EDIT: This is probably incorrect, though there's no real explanation for why the same increase does not seem to be seen in women (or if it is, it's not in the studies I saw). The studies showing the connection to oral sex are linking...

Treatable but not trivial. Women should know it's not like you can take some antibiotics and it all goes away. IF it gets to be a problem, it's a pretty significant medical expense and concern. IF, IF, IF. Again, IF. It often does NOT get to be a problem. I am NOT trying to scare people.

This is true. On the plus side, there is an incredibly low (practically no) personal risk to heterosexual men even if they are in contact with a woman who has active HPV. On the negative side, this allows men to be carriers with relatively low motivation to check it.

Those "things" are almost certainly mucus membranes of infected humans. The actual oral cancers are rare, but the oral spread is probably pretty common. Let's lay this to rest, too. IF you picked up the virus by touching "something," you would then have to relatively immediately touch your own...

No, absolutely not. Now if you make out with the person on the bus for ten minutes and the person has in the last few months given oral sex to someone who was actively shedding the virus... yes, but will it hurt you? Maybe. But probably not. HPV is something like a flu virus that just happens...

Thank you, thank you, thank you. Rarechild - Thank you so much, and I truly hope people will pay attention to what this "silence" does to people. In the poly community, it should not take "guts" for us to be honest with each other. Our communities should not be scaring people that way...

No evidence that I have found. If that were true, then, for myself at least, I would, indeed, place this in the category of things "too impossible to prevent to worry about." One must live life, after all.

Good points. The only "high risk category" named is people with multiple partners, which is what I was addressing. This would really probably not be a problem at all for a monogamous couple, even in a new relationship. Even if they got it, they would probably both fight it off and be clear of...

I retract the word "catapult," however, this could be a bit of a problem with language also: You do NOT have to be irresponsible, at all, to get a high-risk strain of HPV. You can check histories, tests, and use condoms, you can not even have intercourse, and you can still get it, and it's not...

Don't worry, Mono. I'm totally pro-poly and I'm very sensitive to the issues that this sort of thing creates for a community. There's the same danger that we see with intolerant people thinking HIV is a "gay disease." It's a very destructive idea. But I think that the refusal to think about it...

I really hate to do this, but... as far as I could find, there was only one other thread here that mentioned HPV and it was extremely limited, and yet, people who are new to poly (especially those who haven't started meeting new partners yet) really might like to have this information. I know...

I'm on there, sunnydee2009. I've had good experiences there finding polyfolk.

Date poly first. I'm new to both dating and to being poly and I've been struggling with the "when to tell" thing. There's been kind of a steep learning curve, to tell the truth. I do think it's different for me as a woman, but, Beatbox, if at possible, you will find it considerably easier to...