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I've posted only a couple of times, but you can find my intro here: http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=40446 So, an update. :) Things have been slow-going for MD and me. We have spent lots of time together, but without much physical activity, and on a very solid friend basis for...

update lots of talking with LT about how she's reacted to this whole thing. She is making efforts, asking questions about how MD is and such. I am still hurt by the whole reaction, but her efforts do comfort me and give me hope that our friendship will survive.

Possible feelings? MD said the same thing when we were talking about it. I really don't think so, as we have had convos about my bisexuality way before I even had the notion of actually exploring it. She said she could understand, but just didn't feel that way about women. For her, I'd guess...

Trying to transition I said this exact thing to her. She says she is mad that I waited to tell her until I had it "all figured out" and didn't require her input anymore. Of course that isn't the case, but whatever. She says she's on FJ's and my children's "team", and can't get on board with...

Update I have been slammed at work and haven't had much time to respond, but I've been reading responses. It's great to hear from people who have been there! We finally got to have a really long discussion about everything. She has been basically alone in a new town for the past 2 years while...

Another Update Things have been going really well, and mostly without bumps. I'm learning to be more open about how I'm feeling with MD instead of being scared it might scare her away. Which it might, but if it does, then it's not going to work. Not to say that I tell her every little obsession...

Human Mirror Unfortunately, I think that may be true. Which is why I do understand that she may feel like this is a betrayal of sorts. Not that it is, but in her mind I've betrayed who she thinks of me as. I am just taking JaneQ's advice and letting her have space. She knows I'll be here...

Train Wreck Well, that was awful. At first when I told her, she had a few questions but it was the end of the night and was tired. She said she needed some time to process, but that she loved me and would call me the next day. Well, when she called the next day she was angry and had lots of...

Perfect JaneQ- That's exactly what I needed. Those are the perfect words for this situation. I really think she probably already suspects, so I'm hopin it will just be a huge relief for both of us.

So, I've been very best friends with LT since I was 16 or so. We had babies together, both married our high school sweethearts, and have grown as adults together. I still see her 4-5 times a year since we have moved to diff areas of the country. Here's my dilemma. I haven't told her about my 4...

Future Kevin T. Exactly. I have to remember though, that this is the first poly relationship for her. Given her history with any kind of relationship, she doesn't commit to the future. So for now, I'll just take it one day at a time, loving her where she's at and letting her grow.

Speaking Out Loud WhatHappened, I definitely start with the kids and our family. I was simply speaking out loud expressing what I want. But I am fully aware that I can't start with what I want at the expense of others. Thanks for the reminder.

Update GalaGirl- Thank you, those are all excellent suggestions. Love reading through threads and your responses. Your approach to communication is refreshing, and something I definitely strive for in my relationships. I did finally just tell MD how I was feeling. Feeling like she was pulling...

update Yes, I think you are right about my husband and gf getting together solo. I keep getting mixed messages from her, and that's frustrating. I'm not used to this uncharted territory-I am so familiar with my husband, we rarely miscommunicate any more. We actually spend a lot of time with...

Gentle nudges Feeling good today. Been giving MD some space & gentle nudges, and being reaffirmed about our relationship. Feels good. Still unsure of the future, but right now we are on the same page. No need to look into a crystal ball :)

Insecurities Well, it's apparent to me that I have a lot of hidden insecurities to work out. I've been in the same relationship with the most loving and devoted man for 18 years. I don't have to question that at all. The new relationship with MD has me questioning every word and action I say or...

Planning to keep nudging Great advice, thank you! Today I can feel her pulling back. I'm resisting going after her, and just giving her some space, because I know she needs room to sort out her own feelings. But I do feel very lucky and mostly happy about this new relationship. It's damn...

Defining Anytime I've talked about whether this was a serious relationship, she's said something about this town and how she wishes it were different. I'm just not sure if that's a reflection of how she feels about me, our relationship, or just the place we live. I don't think I really have...

To catch up on my story, here's my intro: http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=40446 So, where we are now.... All is well on the front with my husband FJ & I. We are in a really good place of understanding and connection. But (there's always a but, isn't there?) my gf MD is a...

You can read my intro here: http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=40446 So since then, my husband, F, and I have had some really fabulous conversations about what we both want from our relationship right now. He is the very definition of compersion, and I respect him so much for...