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yeah, sorry, if I remember it is a pet peeve to have people coming in asking questions and starting topics that have already been started. I was browsing thread titles a bit but didn't see the search box anywhere. (Plus I forgot the coined "NRE" tag) ahhh... there it is, on the drop down menu!

I wasn't always poly... For me, poly was an evolution, a logical choice and one brought about by personal growth. I have no regrets in how I came to be poly, but I also would not have objected to having a conversation with a poly person back when I was mono, someone trying to show me the logic...

Came up with this today after asking myself what I would be personally interested in thinking/writing about: 1) Define "polyamory" : Being open to love/romance as it comes and goes, without the standard monogamous restriction placed that if you are already involved with someone, you should not...

different modes of interaction I have acted differently depending on the situation and the person I am connecting with. Sometimes we are talking about ourselves and it is perfectly natural to have the conversation about lovestyles and my polyamory. Other times we are connecting over a shared...

Hi guys, haven't been on here in a while, but I have been lurking a bit and a recent conversation with a friend of mine has produced a line of thought. Sometimes I meet a woman and we have a great connection so the process starts of flirting, dating, falling in love, &c. Basically being...

effort

Chronic pain is horrible. I hope everything goes well and you don't need the back surgery. I have a hard time dealing with other people's pain. It makes me feel helpless. :( So sorry if I'm at a loss but I wish you the best :)

I wouldn't say disturbed and dysfunctional from your blog... I have to admit I did think "naive" in regards to the FL couple... but I think you might have even said that yourself? I think what's important is that you took your experiences and got the lessons from them. And I'm not one to talk...

I admit when I lived with my gf, I took out the trash and recyclables and never cleaned the bathroom, even once, or vacuumed. I did clean the kitchen and cook. I didn't really think about how much I was playing a gender role until just now. I wasn't the breadwinner, either! I was going to...

That reminds me of this g/f I had. She was pretty sexy, just naturally. But then she would put on this "trying to be sexy" sort of look/act where she would attempt to have a "smoldering" look and it was just... idk, cheesy and funny and totally NOT sexy at all. lol I never told her that but I...

Welcome Artemis! I find the best way for me is to just open my mouth. Generally what is on my brain ends up being the discussion. I haven't checked your other posts to see if you have a more specific story up yet... I'll go hunting :)

welcome, reffinej and good luck! I second the motion that it's a good idea to let your hubby know what you're up to and the sort of path your thoughts are taking. You mentioned "not having a Hx of being fantastic communicators" so there's no time like the present to start. You've everything...

Well, there are a great many people who insist that because *they* like spicy food, spicy food is the best. And if you eat bland food, they need to insist on telling you how you are blind and why spicy is better, you are just ignorant or uncultured or there is some other thing *wrong* with you...

I've done a couple strip teases for private parties but not as a professional. Though I did get paid to strip for a passion party :)

Is it possible there is a spectrum, with most people laying somewhere between the extremes of 100% mono or 100% poly? Not that the extremes have been defined, but I would think 100% mono would mean one partner for life. A person might date but not get sexual or express romantic love until...

Disclaimer: Included in the following statements are generalizations and therefore subject to discrepancy among individuals. I'm just saying general trend, not every mono person ever. I think that many mono people would view those "possibilities of romantic love" as just pure lust or some...

Someone must know.... All of a sudden we are "Cabin Drudges", "Salty Dogs" and "Deck Hands" instead of "New User", "Archaic User", &c. ??? not that I mind... I love the water!

my opinion/perception of underlying principles: Poly: 1. Love is self-perpetuating in all its forms (romantic, platonic, agape, &c.). The more you love, the more love you have. 2. Mono: 1. Love is self-perpetuating in all forms excepting romantic love. In regards to romantic love, the...

life loves, NSA (non-sexual affection :P ) One of the great loves of my life, "M.", would fall under this thread. She was part of the catalyst "Maia" from the story in this thread that sent me down the poly path. We have to this day still never had sex. She sent me a message the other day...

I wouldn't completely discount relationships as a way of defining oneself. It might not be healthy, but then again, maybe it is? I think one of the problems I see in my culture is that people are somewhat detached and super-independent; or at least they try to be. I remember some psychology...