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...."damage our relationship", meaning the relationship of the OP with her family member, yeah? 'Cuz The OP certainly doesn't want to give the family member any fodder, for sure. OP, if you use this line (which I think is great), make sure you're clear on that bit. My sibling and I don't talk...

Bars? Why bother? Meet people doing something you like, or something you're curious about. The only thing you know you'll have in common with someone at a bar is drinking, and frankly, that doesn't seem to be a good basis to a relationship (in my opinion, anyway). But if you're interested...

So, some more things to consider.... Do please understand that all of this is speculative, as I do not know Jill or you or Jack, and can only speak to what I THINK Jill MAY be like, as she sounds so similar to me. First.... You mentioned past breaches of trust, and that those breaches of...

Hey, I've got some time during a flight, so will be formulating a reply which I'll post when I have internet access again. Just wanted you to know I haven't forgotten you.

I won't have time to reply in-depth for a few days, but I'll try to do so as soon as is easily convenient. Thanks for asking and considering my opinion; I will offer more when I can.

I don't respond on threads here very often; mostly I just read.... I really only ever hop in when I see a point of view that's not been mentioned. So, while there's tons to say, I'm really only going to focus on the bits that no one else has. Please don't take offense; none is meant, I assure...

As others have stated, the "all or nothing" idea can and most likely will set you up for failure, or at least hurt feelings. People aren't equipped with on/off switches, and somewhere down the line some two or three will want sex when the other one or two don't. Imagine the pressure on that...

What an awesome way to start! It's very, very good that you talked with him. Well done! Perhaps you could suggest he take a look at this forum and other resources? He can get just as much support here as you can :) He sounds like an awesome guy; congrats :)

You make me think of a couple more things you should consider about all this. It does, in fact, sound like you can and want to love multiple people. Loving is easy, though; it's managing relationships that is hard. Very, very hard, sometimes. - Do you think you can realistically manage more...

If it means anything, I still think you sound like a very intelligent, well-spoken (err, written) individual. And I think you'll benefit tremendously from all of the challenges you're having the opportunity to face.

Treat this as a game, a fantasy. You might find ways that it can be great fun. You can act a part, take on the persona of a character.... And think of him the same way, play-acting. Maybe he has fantasies he can tell you about and you can act them out. For me, genderbending is easier in a...

Might I also recommend remaining sober this trip? Or at least limiting consumption so you don't get even moderately intoxicated? I only suggest this because of the possibility of him pushing while your inhibitions are already artificially lowered, and possibly putting you in another bad...

You might add, "If you DON'T respect this boundary, I will be less likely to consider group sex with you, and if pushed, may end our relationship entirely." Or whatever else you might want/need to say. You've mentioned that this guy has been nicer and more giving to you than any previous...

I almost never post here. Mostly I just lurk. If there's a point-of-view or some such that's been left out of a thread, then I might speak up. Mostly I just lurk. But after seeing that disturbed post from PaulFromN.O. (who is either a troll or worse, IMHO), and that you'd read and responded to...

It sounds to me like you're being pretty strong and supportive about this. I do think you're right to be upset/worried about the lying. Try to get to the bottom of that with her, why she did what she did, and hid what she hid. If you can help her figure out WHY she was deceitful, maybe you guys...

Silia.... Some things you might think about for a little while.... One can have and love friends without dating and sleeping with them. Polyamorous, monogamous, whateverous, you can certainly have and love your friends. Infatuation happens. And it happens to pretty much everyone. That...

He likes your potential?? He hopes to mold you into what HE wants?!?! Repeat after me: Fuck That Shit. You belong to YOU. YOU own your potential. YOU get to mold you into what YOU want. This guy has disrespected you, used you to bolster his Hugh Hefner style fantasy, has openly admitted...

I keep seeing posts telling you that your wife might still change her mind, come around to your way of thinking... I don't mean to rain on the parade, but you also need to recognize that your wife has EVERY RIGHT to want to have a monogamous relationship. When you were younger, when you married...

This. Now, believe me when I say I'm not trying to be harsh, okay? Seriously, I'm not. So try to be impartial about what I'm gonna say, okay? I mean it with good intentions, I really do. But I'm gonna pick apart your actions and reactions, and it might seem like I'm being a jerk. You asked...

Sorry for posting at the same time. I'm glad you took what Neon said to heart.