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Pain and pragmatics GalaGirl, thanks. There are certainly some things in there I needed to hear. I appreciate your perspective. I can't go on the trip alone or with my son because my best friend is getting married at a couples-only adult resort. No children allowed. It sucks. I appreciate...

Update: Well, three days after being told that she has intentions to end our marriage, my wife told me that she has devised a plan: First, she wants to take the two vacations we had planned together for this spring- one to Disney World in March and the other to Jamaica in May to see my best...

Looks like it's over. I wanted to thank everyone for the support. My wife just told me tonight that she has plans to end our marriage in the next few months. I am a wreck. She told me that she just doesn't want to be married anymore and has lost her belief in romantic love. She doesn't love...

I never thought of it like that (i.e., current active love). That's a really apt way of saying it. I've always felt like she would always be special because of being the mother of my son, but I hadn't thought of her being a love of my life if we were to split. I guess I'm realizing that my...

You make a good point that I came to realize this week. After going through this last year of agonizing about every detail, I really reached a breaking point this week: I no longer care what happens, I just want to be done getting hurt. To that end, I told my wife earlier this week that I just...

Falling to Pieces I wrote my wife a letter that I thought was pretty hopeful. In it, I asked a lot of questions so I would better understand where she's at. She wouldn't even read it. She said she's no longer interested in other partners, and she wants to be alone. This spawned an argument...

Anne, you're right. I agree with your analysis. I was latching onto Laura, and I'm sure she sees it. (She's perceptive.) After having read my posts, she corrected me and stated that since she committed to her husband, they have not been poly. I misinterpreted some of what she had told me...

From Worse to Better Days After a fairly rough week leading up to Christmas, my wife and I had a very enjoyable Christmas Day. Christmas morning was the typical onslaught of wrapping paper, coffee, and my wife and me enjoying the little bit of magic that is left for our 10-year old. (He's not...

Understood. I don't know. I am still confused and have no clue what I want, what I can handle and how it might all work. I don't even know the difference between some of the terms you just threw out there. LOL When I brought up group sex with the other couple, I was merely talking about it...

WOW. When I was reading this, it was almost as if I was reading my own personal journal of feelings. With only slight nuances of difference, it seems as though we are dealing with very similar circumstances. Thank you for your post, it is comforting to hear that I am not the only one feeling...

GG, you make some good points that I had not considered. There is, however, some information that you don't have. The other couple, let's call them Laura and Greg, have been very good friends of ours for the last 10 years. My wife and I are close mutual friends of Laura's and we all go out all...

Voice? I'm not so sure. First, let me say that she and I do love each other very much. You make a good point that I had not considered: she may very well feel very strongly about not being involved with another couple. I am not really upset about that. It is more the immediate reaction of "Not...

Compromise? The way I brought it up was to ask her what it is that she is interested in experiencing with other potential partners. I gave her the space to express her desires, then commented on them by expressing that I wasn't comfortable with that yet. She asked if I had given any thought to...

This concerns me a little; I never seriously considered poly before my wife brought it up. I have been completely content with her and only her. That said, I am working hard to remain open minded and give what she wants (or seems to want) real and honest consideration. The foursome I...

I waited just over a week. I felt like that was sufficient time for her and me to process what had just happened. The clinginess started after everything was over. She referred to more than one, but she may have specific plans for one in particular. She has told me that she loves me more...

Wife is okay Update: after seeing a neurologist, my wife received good news. She doesn't have what they originally thought. "Overwhelming relief" is the only way I can describe what we are both feeling. She is still experiencing symptoms, but the doctor explained that a medication interaction...

Thanks again to all the posters on my thread. The support is amazing and I really needed it. I am taking the break I mentioned earlier because my wife went to the doctor on Friday and found out she may have a life threatening condition. I need to be her rock right now and that comes before my...

Whoa... I feel like this is getting out of control. If there are any issues between my wife and me, we have the tools to work them out. We've been married for 12 years. When my wife explained everything, she said that she didn't start feeling this way until early this year. That tells me we...

I feel like you are over-simplifying this. There are things that I need to figure out that I don't necessarily want to bring up to my wife until I'm ready. Privacy of thoughts doesn't automatically mean poor communication. A great example is what happened the other night: I was in a...

LovingRadiance: Thank you, I’m trying to breathe. I think maybe I’m trying to take on too much at once. I'm putting the cart before the horse Love2Bake: I feel broken. I’m certain I’m taking things personally that I shouldn’t be. I'm sure that the day will come when I will be sure of how I feel...