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Hey KeenSprinter, I am in a very similar situation as you. We call ourselves a quad mostly because its a fun word to say :-) But there are so many varieties of poly. Quads seem to be less common. I am happy to hear that your group is finding happiness. As Magdlyn said NRE is very powerful...

I agree, AG. To be clear, the people I am referring to are only close family and friends, people I love, trust and respect. For them, its worth the effort. This is the reason for our hesitation for our quad to come out. One day soon, methinks.

"Take me or leave me" sentiments have no place in healthy relationships, IMO. :) It's taken me 2 years to get comfortable with my lifestyle and fully break down those monogamous values of right and wrong. How can I possibly expect everyone else to give me their full support immediately after I...

I know exactly how you feel. This has been a tough challenge for us, as well. We have recently told the kids, because we felt that being honest with our children is first and foremost. In addition, we wanted them to enjoy the feeling of a larger extended family. Some of the kids are very cool...

Not yet... The kids know. Close family must suspect something because we haven't been very careful lately. It's only a matter of time but its not something we care too much about. Outside of close family we wish to keep it private. ~S

It's great that you are both willing to try work on it. My (18 yr) marriage has COMPLETELY changed in the past 2 years. It is far more complicated and requires much more understanding and patience. But we have allowed each other to enter into a new world full of love, hope and fulfilment. It...

Boy how many threads are there in this forum re. challenges in dividing your time equally and fairly? After almost 2 years I completely understand those challenges. Now that I honestly feel that my SO + OSO are equals in my heart, this has become a big challenge. I completely subscribe to the...

Poobah, I'm sorry to hear about your struggles. In many ways, I understand exactly what you are going through. Quads are complicated that way. My wife and I are in a quad with another couple, and in my experience, I've found relationships between metamours to be extra challenging. I guess I find...

Our Journey Howdy All. This thread makes my happy. Honestly this forum needs more content about success. I am a 40 something male in a mfmf quad which started 18 months ago. I love to learn and share experiences and so far, I am the only one in my tribe who wants to do that. :-) For...

Thanks for your comments everyone. We certainly do not plan to discuss any intimate details, no children want/need to know any of that. The feeling of extended family should be already present since both families are always hanging out together. So, our teen is always exposed to the love...

Howdy All, I need some advice... how to successfully let your teenager know that mom and dad are happily poly. We have been in a quad for a while now and feel that now our relationships are stable enough to discuss it with our children. Our quad do not live together but we are often hanging...

Hello Tia, It's nice to meet you. Well yes, it happened by accident to us as well. We were never swingers however, just best friends with another couple. It started one crazy evening last summer. Since then it has been a roller coaster of exciting, stressful, blissful and challenging...

Where a quad and loving it!

Welcome Steve, Welcome to the forum and yes I agree that you are in the right place. I am responding to your post because my wife and I are in the same situation with another couple. We did not start as swingers mind you but that doesn't matter anyway. Your current situation relates to...

Thanks, RGJ. Perhaps there is hope for us down the road. :) We live in the PNW, as well, and yes, I agree people here are very liberal. My wife is also in childcare, so that's very interesting. Either way, it's a big decision, and it will require all four of us to make the leap, or, as I...

Tough one GK, we have had a few conversations about this in our quad this summer. We are out to NO ONE. I know this topic has been discussed at length here. As our relationships continue to develop, I find it gets harder and harder to live in secrecy. But all four of us have to completely...

You have it good! Hey, Poobah. This is an interesting post, because I have exactly the same situation you describe. However, I think that your situation is pretty good. Let me explain: My wife and I are in a quad with another married couple. Me: Extroverted My gf: Extroverted My Wife...

Flowerchild I have to completely agree. Our quad has spoken about this a lot lately. For my wife and I, we mostly maintain a conservative family. Meaning any PDA is rather minor (kiss here, a hug there). My teenage son usually scoffs at the sight of it and looks away with "gross" comment...

Dagferi, I agree totally. Our quad came up with a rule from the beginning, which we still use religiously. If anyone has a problem which involves the group, they are required to SPEAK UP! It sounds simple, but it's not always easy to upset the apple cart and say something. Problems happened...

I couldn't disagree more. My wife and I are in a quad with another couple who were at first our very best friends. It is simply wonderful. Is it difficult sometimes? Yes, but that's to be expected. Why does it seem that people who are not 100% comfortable yet with an idea or change to the...