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    Phase 2 - Dave Continues

    Updates! Susan trusts me more and more. She's become much more vulnerable, and depends on me. Knowing her trust issues makes it a huge responsibility, but one I cherish. She's still stressed out with personal stuff, so I haven't been able to visit, but we have tentative plans to take a vacation...
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    Phase 2 - Dave Continues

    Obviously it has been a while since I've posted, but there's been nothing to say. Susan and I are good, but it's really a terrible time for her. She's in better place this week, but it will be temporary for a while, and there's no telling how long that would be. Our meeting went well. She was...
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    On being disabled, sexuality, and becoming poly.

    My lover is long distance, so it's not directly applicable, but our timeframes just mesh well. We talk during the day at work, and then later in the evening after spouse and kids are asleep. She generally only sees her local bf on the weekends, so I work into her schedule equally well. I visit...
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    Phase 2 - Dave Continues

    Susan's tough times continue, but it's making us closer. She had two bad experiences this week. I stayed up with her texting as much as I could. I talked to her on the phone when she could. I Skyped her to sleep last night. She's doing really well, considering. I'm glad I'm there to virtually...
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    Why hide?~

    Right. I'm not willing to put my wife or girlfriend through that much judgement either. In most cases being obvious about relationship(s) doesn't just affect you.
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    On being disabled, sexuality, and becoming poly.

    Almost all modern email systems allow you to set up rules that will do just that, and you only have to be strong once to set up the rule.
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    Sailing Solo

    It's not all baloney. I'm not even sure it's partial baloney. I would love to get in their head as Susan is the same way. Every so often she'll get it in her head that I don't want her any more and instead of trying to get closer, she backs off and spends time with anyone but me. I don't get...
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    Phase 2 - Dave Continues

    It was a good weekend. I spend a lot of time with both Kay and Susan independently. It's rare that Kay will go out with my friends and me. This time, though, we went out both Friday and Saturday. We also ran errands together on Sunday. Susan and I talked quite a bit. We got into a little bit of...
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    Ideal world: Future poly?

    One of the things that I think will make poly much more accepted is ever increasing life spans. I think we are on the brink of some dramatic jumps (aging + cancer), and an extra 20 to 40 years (maybe more) are going to change the way we think about relationships.
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    Phase 2 - Dave Continues

    This really hit home with me. I tend to talk about my relationships a lot. I'm excited about them. I want to be able to share them. I love when people are interested in them. I told a couple of my co-workers about Susan and one was very interested. The other was sort of shocked by the whole...
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    Fun and Frolic With Long-Term Love

    That is definitely a different story. You absolutely shouldn't be made to feel marginalized. Once you're feeling neglected and there is consistently no action (words are just words), it's time to start letting go, in my opinion. It doesn't make it any easier, though.
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    Confused with poly girlfriend

    This is important. Time perception changes both with age and experience. I have this issue pretty consistently. If I would just let a few days elapse before drawing conclusions, I'd likely avoid a whole host of emotional trauma. So "slowing down" for one person can be days, where "slowing down"...
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    Fun and Frolic With Long-Term Love

    I'm right there with you. I'm caught in between myself. My brain says I should back off of Susan. I love her. I love my time around her, but she rarely will commit to anything or make me a priority unless I say I'm feeling neglected. My heart is just the opposite. She loves my adoration and...
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    stories in extended triad land

    Thanks a wonderful gift!
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    Phase 2 - Dave Continues

    For reasons I don't want to get into, I'm going to start a new thread. In the last episode, (T/Tiara, aka) Susan and I were breaking up. She needed to explore some feelings with one of her other men, and wasn't sure she'd be able to fully dedicate even one night a week to me. We talked and...
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    Sailing Solo

    Yes it's your business. Your health is your business. And the lying is the problem. If you can't trust them about that, you can't trust them about anything.
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    Dave's Story

    I told her I can't be a consolation prize, or her dirty little secret any more. She understands and "knows [she] is doing the wrong thing." We both acknowledged that is because when she wants me back I'll be there. There are so many aggravating things about this, but I have to let it go. She's...
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    Dave's Story

    Tuesday I sent her an email advising that she really needed to tell Daley about her lifestyle. I didn't tell her what to do. I didn't tell her to take my word for it. I said she should ask someone close, confidential, and non-judgmental. But if she truly cares about Daley, it's going to come out...
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    Dave's Story

    So, Susan has not talked to me since late Tuesday. I did, thankfully, get one assurance that she is physically ok. Yes, yes. I know that 36 hours is quite common for most of you, but it's not for us. Often there isn't much content. Just an emoticon text, or a brief message. But without some...
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    Phy's story - as you like it

    Congratulations, Phy!
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