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;) I've heard she recommends that one be blythe and bonny.... :D Also, don't I wish! Poor Fig. ;)

So far, so good on this side! :D xoxoxox

Yes, zen this week. Who knows what will happen tomorrow, next month, whenever. I am susceptible to dementors swirling around me, amplifying all of my insecurities, and they can hit at any time. (Sorry for the Harry Potter reference! Best analogy I have though.) I suspect this paragraph is...

Hi goodnightmoon, and welcome to the forum! Um, I'm sort of new to all this myself, but my question here is what your fiancé means by "open marriage". I think there's an important nuance between that and poly. How do you feel in general (situation about G aside) about his being emotionally...

Hello Autumn! I'd say it's still in the early days -we're about 5-6 weeks in from realizing we were looking at a poly thing, I think? When I posted this thread, we were less than a week in. Not sure a lot has changed. To date, we're all very conscious of each other's comfort and there's a...

Hello Autumn! Welcome to the forum. :) There are all kinds of configurations around here and different stories about why various partners are in this world. I think you will find kindred spirits. What does your partner think about poly for herself? Depending upon where she falls on the...

Sooo...is the situation that you accept that your husband brings this other woman into the home that you share - and in fact you are responsible for "setting up her room" - or you will be without a place to live unless a relative or friend takes you in? Because even though you're married, it's...

You know, I am sort of new here, and am admittedly not immersed in the poly community - am not poly myself (bf is.) So, grains of salt for the outsider and all of that. But, I have been married before, and there was infidelity in the marriage - which was devastating to both parties. Two and a...

First, in general, this has given me much to think about. I just knew that others had given this tons of thought and could articulate different ways to consider and different perspectives. As I've said elsewhere, for me, this is all new pathways of thinking (less than a month now), and...

I'm sort of turning over the question in my head this evening of whether or not being secondary in the hierarchy means I am getting (or settling for) less. Sort of in the context of answering the question, "If you give all of yourself to someone, why would you settle for any less in return?"...

I am not a fan of jealousy. Worried that feeling it or expressing it shows something inherently negative in my character. Worried that it shows lack of faith and trust. That if it's there then my partner will take this as a sign that I can't do this or that he shouldn't ask me to and then I'll...

And now, Monday evening. Not feeling as enlightened at the moment. Ouch. Squirm. *Deep breath* Maybe tomorrow will bring some zen.

Well, that was interesting. Meeting/hanging out with the metamour for the first time. There aren't any real questions contained herein. Some of you read last week about this journey that is brand new for me and the others in my V, and this is just sort of an update about crashing through some...

Just checked in here before walking out of the door in a few minutes, and wanted to post a quick reply, though I intend to come back later with a more thorough one. No promises though. First few thoughts - as someone with a degree in Women's Studies, I totally get this line of thinking...

Sorry, I should clarify. I was trying to be economical with words (not my strong suit) and left out some detail. His feelings / sense of responsibility about the situation here are not identical to hers. Now, it's sort of sketchy of me to describe for them what they're feeling/thinking, but...

Yeah, I guess this was mostly an essay and an exercise in self-articulation - though I am in fact very eager to leverage the lessons that those who have come before me have learned. Hoping for tips and suggestions for carefully and thoughtfully entering into a type of relationship with which I...

Thank you for these excellent recommendations. I think I will tend to err on the side of over communicating. My failed marriage had dearth of communication, so it's possible that I'm overcompensating in the other direction. I've stuck my toe in the water by being very open to his expressing to...

Thanks for the welcome, Kevin! It's an odd thing, being here and not sure that I belong. Your compliments are much appreciated. My guy and his wife (UGH, as a 3rd wave feminist, it rankles me to reduce anyone to their marriage status. I should develop empowering nicknames for them both that...

First: This is almost unforgivably long. And I edited out a lot! I discovered this forum a couple of days ago after the realization 4 days ago that my boyfriend, while completely committing to our relationship, is also still in love with his soon-to-be ex-wife. He will continue to enjoy a...

They're getting divorced b/c he very much wants sex and she very rarely does, as she considers herself asexual. It's taken hours of explaining it to me for me to really get it. She really, really, really doesn't desire sex and feels horrible that she cannot offer him what she doesn't feel when...