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Have you dated only gay men and straight women? I ask because, now that you realize you're bi, I wonder if you've explored the dynamic of dating other people who are bi or pan themselves. You may find that the dynamic is different with a bi man versus a gay man, or bi woman versus a straight...

*HUGS* I'm so sorry. I've been through having to put a pet down a few times, sending comfort and healing vibes your way.

I'm so, so sorry you're having to go through this. I just wanted clarification on something for myself, if you don't mind: and Ummm...whuck? Am I misreading this? Or is the father who was physically and emotionally abusive to his own son now one of the people helping watch your child...

Thank you for all the effort you put into your blog and these updates Alan! I greatly appreciate them as this forum is one of my only connections to the rest of the world of poly. :)

I agree with this. I also think, though, that there's some merit to the idea of "you don't know until you try". If you're curious about whether you'd be able to be poly yourself, then what's the harm in putting up a profile on OKCupid and seeing what happens? As long as you're honest about "I'm...

I similarly have no big desire to be out publicly, but right now I HATE that I am lying to my parents and my children. I keep telling myself, "Once we live together and there's solid evidence that my marriage and my kids are FINE, then telling my mom will be worth the upset that will occur. I...

MC and I have been together for almost 15 years, as we've definitely changed the "rules" many times. We started in college with just make-out sessions and only if the other wasn't there (studying, at work, out of town, whatever). It wasn't until this year that he became comfortable enough with...

Funny how no one should call you rude or offensive, nycindie, cause you're "just some stranger on the internet", but you seem to feel awfully justified in being prickly and defensive back to "just strangers on the internet". Sounds like he might be more comfortable with swinging or an open...

My number is different depending on what the person asking the questions means by "sex". It can be quite low, if we're only talking PiV/PiA sex, or well into the double digits if the question includes other activities. I wish that getting something for having sex didn't have the negative feel...

GET OUT AND GET HELP. He is not good for you. He is not respecting you. Once you're out and he calms down, then you can offer to resume talks. Perhaps he will be more willing to listen after you've left, perhaps not. But at least you'll be in a safer place (mentally and physically) to try...

He's lying to her and not allowing her to make her own decision regarding sexual health risk. Even in a D/s situation this is not okay (I'm not part of that scene but TGIB is). If he was really being a good Dom to her he'd explain the actual situation to her and be teacher and caretaker while...

No, I'm going to tell her, in actuality, that I can not trust her decisions after such a hugely poor choice, and that I do not want such a blatant example of a lack of respect for oneself around my children. I prefer they have examples around them of people who have a feeling of self-confidence...

Her children are all in their 40's. This is her second husband (after a very messy, nasty divorce from her first asshole cheater husband) and they have no children together. So, though I wouldn't be surprised if he's preying on her insecurities and fear of being alone, along with her lack of...

This isn't really about poly, but is a question about when one crosses a line from being honest to over-sharing or being cruel, so I thought I'd bring it to you all, since that's a topic that comes up a lot. So, a tiny bit of background: last year, my family learned that my uncle (by marriage...

I'm afraid I don't have any suggestions but I do have empathy for her! Even a few years down the road, I still occasionally deal with feelings of, "Can it really be okay that I get to have BOTH of them?" and "Am I being selfish? Am I hurting one of my partners, even though he says he's fine??"...

With your wife only 2 months from her due date, I'm going to advise CAUTION about discussing it. We don't know her at all, so you're the best judge of this, but PLEASE choose your time carefully. Hopefully she is not suffering from the insane hormones and radical mood swings that some pregnant...

Your Mileage May Vary (i.e. this is one person's perspective/experience, you may or may not agree)

Sure. And part of that discussion is also if/how "bisexual" is different from "pansexual". Really hard to have that discussion if everyone who tends to only be attracted to certain examples of cis-gendered people are worried about being called transphobic or having to defend their explanations...

I understand where you're coming from, Annabel, but I think this followed by this is what came across as more accusatory than explanatory. Calling something transphobic, or any kind of phobic, is a rather serious accusation. Softening it with "kind of" didn't help much- a better way might...

Hello, Dolly! (as the song runs through my head- sorry, it had to go somewhere!) Not that it matters, but I'm slightly confused- did you mean a FMF triad? Or are you and Hubby both male? Either way, welcome!