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Thanks Meera. :) I am not sure about some of the gift-giving limitations, women so love to show off baubles offered by admirers. But I know this, and wouldn't want to disappoint such a lovely partner. As to your comment about respective partners, point well taken. But, should such a fantasy...

The context: A (a man) and B (a woman) have been “together” for a while now, maybe a year or so. They are not married to each other, neither do they live together. Both have full, satisfying, lives apart from the relationship with each other. Both have sufficient affection, sex, companionship...

I for one am not fretting, but I do like to get into intellectual discussions of complex topics (obviously). And I assure you, I do get out and meet people. But I don't agree that you can't make generalities. There are some basic patterns that I see in what men and women want from...

Oh, I don't particularly want an entire romantic relationship. I would be quite happy with occasional playful, affectionate sex with a friend. The problem is, such things don't happen very much, not even when you are single. As I already said elsewhere, such episodes happened with me, very...

Thank you, Cleo. From your answer it is obvious that what I want is not impossible. I just noticed as well that you are in Europe, where I am also from originally. A lot of the discussion on polyness seems to be centred on North America, where at least some people think that what they think...

Perfectly legitimate questions. I would get much tougher ones from relatives and friends were I to reveal my polyness to them! Three answers, without too much elaboration: 1. Variety, just as nycindie suggests. I like my wife's cooking too, but still like to try other peoples' (and...

Hi again. Interesting discussion. I wish some others would join in! Hey, hey, too many questions in one paragraph! :) 1) I was talking about people in the mono world. That's where being single is an asset. Now I am ready to enter the poly world, but not at all cost. If for some reason my...

Hi again. Interesting discussion. I wish some others would join in! Hey, hey, too many questions in one paragraph! :) 1) I was talking about people in the mono world. That's where being single is an asset. Now I am ready to enter the poly world, but not at all cost. If for some reason my...

I am married. I do not practice poly, because I have not found anyone to practice it with. Maybe one day. Or I'll get another hobby.

Admittedly, I don't pay as much attention to my clothes as I probably should. I am also a bit overweight, I am working on that. This matters for superficial contacts only, though. Maybe I am a bit too sure of myself, but I could easily name half a dozen women who would take me on tomorrow...

To be fair, rory, I never said that my only really obvious dating-world strength was monogamy. I said it was the trump card that might tilt things in my favour. And no, I don't think that monogamy is what women want in exchange for sex. But whatever they want (and this changes from woman to...

Hi Onoma, thank you for taking my thoughts seriously, and for going to the trouble of answering them. Basically, what I am trying to do is to bounce off my ideas to people knowledgeable about the poly scene, so that I can improve my chances in their world. Actually, I have lived on four...

Well, if I didn't want a relationship strongly, how did I end up in one lasting over thirty years? Raising two kids, living on three continents. If I didn't want strongly to be with my wife, she would have decamped ages ago. While she doesn't mind me being poly, she would strongly mind not being...

Thanks Annabel, of course I'll keep it in mind. In our couple, we have never been big on public displays of affection, it's more like continuous teasing banter, something that even some mono friends have noticeably become jealous about. "How can you guys have that when I can't?", seems to be how...

Right on the spot, onoma, that is exactly the problem. I am not by nature particularly observant when it comes to interpreting other peoples' emotions anyway, but my rather unusual teenage years added to this difficulty. My parents took me from my native environment (a Central European country)...

Thanks, BoringGuy (which I am sure you are not :) ) This brings up the topic of coming out to one's friends and family, which is quite another topic from what we are discussing here. I am on Facebook, and for a while I did put "Open" into my profile. One reaction I got was from a former...

Thanks, AnnabelMore and Phy! :) I am obviously looking for insights by outsiders, and all thoughtful comments are welcome. I am not so much looking for "dating" advice as for pointers as to how to behave in the poly world so that I can function more effectively in it. And who knows, some of...

Hi Phy, and thanks for your comment. Of course I have many things special about me, or so I like to think. But these things are not the qualities that are most appreciated in the dating world - if they were, I would be overwhelmed by offers. I never had trouble having female friends - but, by...

Don't get me wrong, I have absolutely nothing against being poly. Anyone out there wanting to try me for a possible poly relationship - long-term, temporary, whatever, just drop me a line. I am smart, interesting, not even that bad-looking, just ask my wife. Nevertheless, now that I have been...

As a relatively new member, I don't mind if old issues are re-discussed on this Forum. It may be old hat to you guys, it's all new to me. And new members may have new perspectives to add. I am also a linguist, not just a PolyLinguist. I spend a lot of time thinking about words and what they...