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Agreed. While playing the 'she's not sure of herself' card is a popular sterotype, I think taking people at face value and moving on with life is a lot easier than questioning the validity of the message. These are adults living their lives, regardless of the semantics of words. The choices are...

Doesn't seem like coercion causing it. Seems like a genuine decision to detach. She's doing it in a fairly calm, maintain the friendship kind of way. Hard to fault it.

Might want to take a look into whether or not your husband is in a mid-life crisis, or existential crisis, if you prefer. Sounds like he may be facing some inner turmoil and doesn't know how to handle it. People react differently to their loved ones pending mortality, and in some cases react...

Agreed with the last two posters. Give it up, you're friends without sexual benefits now. Accept it and be happy for her.

Rules are only worth the paper they're printed on. If you're not valuable or worthy of respect to a person, a set of rules certainly isn't going to change that. And if you're not coming off as being worth respect, why? I'm not referring to Lamien, but everyone around you. Regardless of whom...

Before you go into one direction or another - What happened between now and four months ago when you 'couldn't imagine not having either in your life'? There are some major holes in your story, and your husband getting a girlfriend doesn't add up to a divorce. What's really been going on...

You have a self-confidence that many others don't. I used to get frustrated watching people end up in these inextricable situations, until I realized that there was absolutely nothing to do. Except to sit back and see if they figure out their own responsibility in running their lives.

Aside from looking for a 'triad', what kind of relationship do you tell people you're looking for? How do you describe your ideal? Dating two people at once can be a triad, with or without sexual connotations, with lots of other personal definitions depending on who is talking about it...

Advice/Opinion: A couple dating another couple is usually a bad idea. Too many points of failure. Keep the friendship and save the drama. They don't communicate very well, which tells you all you really need to know, if you think about it hard enough.

I don't know the answer to your question, but I think your post might be a good personals ad in your attempt to find that person.

Of course who the audience is intended to be creates some of the reaction. Conservative, gun-toting grandmothers tend dislike poly or anything like it, whereas wackos like me are more open minded. For support, my suggestion is to post your stuff here. You couldnt have a better audience. The...

Welcome to the site. Your only mistake in any of this is assuming that other people have any right to make it their business. To be blunt, whom you choose to have feeling for is nobody's choice but your own. Giving other people room to judge, pick and question your faith and principles over...

Funny, but if the man you'd want has started pushing you into a corner to screw over a human being that cares about him, and loves you, it would certainly make me pause. For all of Bob's awesomeness, I'd never trust a man willing to knock others down to get his own way. But it's your life, and...

My thoughts exactly. He did something quite wrong, but most people do something quite wrong at one time or another. The world is filled with things to be outraged about, in fact. How we react says more about ourselves than about the transgression committed.

This might one of the more positive blogs on the site, and I'm glad you're taking the time to write it. It's not an exaggeration when I say it's an absolute pleasure to see people posting here who aren't in the middle of a crisis, or suffering some kind of self-absorbed preoccupation with...

Bob might be hinting to see if there's interest on your part in the same. If you want them both, it might help to re-establish how much you care about them both and wouldn't want to be without either one. Bob might need the occasional reminder of those shared feelings for both of them. Just a...

Your last post struck a nerve in me. I too have wished many times for a loved one to recognize effort, and reciprocate with some of their own. I think for all the talk, though, some people are just not wired to have that mindfulness about their relationships. Either you have to literally tell...

Okay...well that's interesting advice.

Sigh, this is probably in no way constructive. This is a passionate blog with a lot of topics that hit home for folks. But c'mon, why persist?

I wish I had successful experience to pass on regarding getting an ISFP to open up, on a more than rarely situational basis. My personality started as a deep INFJ years ago but has gradually shifted to me being very close to an ENFJ now. Not quite, but still I think it's due to the amount of...