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It's been really uncomfortable, I've had some real heart ache,but I've stuck to my guns. I appreciate you asking.

Really? What have you brought to this conversation, that was productive?

Then next time I'd suggest not using the royal "we". As in '"we" are not amused.' :)

There is nothing that I need from "we".

Sarcasm, is really the lowest common denominator. I appreciate directness, and honesty. I've been trying to do both as best as I can. This diatribe, it's ironic, you've just undermined your own argument.

I believe snow melt asked a question, it seems to be gone / edited away. When was the last time I saw her? Briefly yesterday. I told her I would no longer be supporting her.

I'm not interested in drama. Yes, I've made mistakes. Yes I own them. Please read the preface. If I only wanted to be a victim, I'd have not asked for insight or help, I would have relished my role, and dug in, not looked for a way out. You imply that, I came into this wanting for things to...

I'd agree I have / have had, fear, loneliness, attachment. In the good times much pleasure in her company, and think whatever you might, I do love her. Those are the major reasons. None of these are good reasons to stay. Or outweigh the abuse I've felt.

I am not walking towards her, I'd say I've stopped, and am turning away. I'm trying to come to terms with my own ego, fear, weaknesses, and failures. I've done this slowly; but it's been consistent, and a self aware choice. I do have self doubt, it's one of the reasons I'm here. I'm not...

1) I had to leave, and was unsure when I could reply. I was trying to be polite. I'll go back re-read the questions and try to reply in a timely fashion.

I thought about this, and it resonated. I've said this to her more than once. One of my needs, was to be with someone who listens. When I've been most unhappy in the relationship, has been when she did not listen, or cherry picked one thing out of a conversation.

I'm back. And I'll be direct while answering your questions. I've been surprised by the directness. I like it. Yes, this has been true, and I've seen it, in both small, and large ways. I'm not uncomfortable, I would say, I'm learning how to communicate both to you, and within this forum...

No; I get written form. I'll try to be more direct. It may be more of my inability to just say yes or no. Yes, the problem lies with her and I. Yes, and this lesson was one of the most difficult, I can't blame him for what happened. Yes I agree with this statement, 100%. I agree with this...

Wanted to reply, with a non-reply. I'll have to answer this later today.

I'm not walking towards her, I've been turning, and walking away. It's been hell. And I've tried not to burn the bridge as I've done it. You may ask why worry about burning the bridge? That''s for my sake, not hers.

This point has been driven home so many ways, and well before I came and asked the question. I'd say this has been a learning experience for me. Each time, I avoided that question, I got hit by the clue stick, and each time it hit harder. I've been sure of these answers for a while. I came...

I missed this before, wanted to comment. * It was a moment of impulse, I'm not excusing it, just context. * The person whom I had a affair with, was her friend first. * The person whom I had the affair with, knew the situation ( lies / cheating /blaming ) and in her own way was trying to...

I take all of these to heart. It's the lesson I keep/kept on learning over and over. Not standing up for myself, not facing the truth, that it was abuse, not some lack in myself. I own what has happened. I've been struggling to wrap my arms around it all, and face her directly. And I have been...

I'd agree the probem is between her and I.

I I'd say yes to some sort of polyamory, and ask for the same things, honesty, take it as it comes. but I'd add that I'd be afraid, because I was but didn't admit that then. And white knuckling did not help the process. DADT, absolutely not. I disagree strongly. The one thing I've learned...