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This is totally off relationship stuff but then most helpful thing for me when I was dealing with depression was to make a list of 5 things to do for me every day. They were simple little things like drink a cup of coffee on the porch. Smile. Watch the first stupid cat video online. Etc. It...

Or conversely the wife is sometimes only casually interested. In my experience, many bi curious / exploring women discover that they prefer same sex interactions on a more limited basis. Lady describes it like this: "women are like cheesecake for me, I love it, it's a great treat, but I get...

Yeah my response would be 'oh hell no!' Talk about what's behind the kissing rule. What emotion/fear does the rule protect? How can these things be addressed in a way that is less intrusive to your dating partners?

Perhaps I'm projecting. I have difficulty with D/s dynamics and mistrust power exchanges. Thus I choose to be with people who conduct their relationships in an egalitarian model. When lady and I have tried dating each other, her D/s relationship with R disturbed me too much. It was weird to...

So Real, Lady and the kids and I are heading to vacation together as a family in about 10 days. We've done weekend camping and stuff together a few times over the past few years but this is the first official big vacation. We've talked through the big stuff (sleeping arrangements, one on one...

The revenge thing also confuses me. Unless all three of you have talked and everyone prefers a closed model, everyone involved should have the ability to explore multiple relationships if they choose. In my experience the freedom helps to keep resentment from brewing. In my vee, real...

We play board games and are part of a d&d group. We also like picking a menu and all cooking together. Playing pool and mini golf are good. We also do pub trivia together sometimes. As for mutual validation we have done karaoke by pairing off into various duets

It sounds as though you and she have some sexual chemistry but less romantic chemistry? You describe yourself as very bisexual... perhaps she is not as wired that way? Or used to an ongoing relationship with another woman? Or perhaps she feels a more intense connection with him? When real...

Real and I have been talking about doing a similar ceremony. I love reading your blog and all the details about your wedding. I may pm you as we start planning. Your journey has been a great guideline for lady and real and i. Thank you for sharing!

Sorry things have gone roughly for you. Break ups suck. I don't know if my input would be helpful here but I thought I'd share a perspective. It can be very scary for us non live in partners when even the possibility of a new outside partner is introduced. I know when real was even casually...

When real stays with me we have a semi scheduled text break to answer messages at his kids bedtime. We use fifteenth messaging services for unimportant trivial convo so the alerts are different sounds. That way we know the bike sounds mean important while that water drops are simple things...

Having been the single woman in a swinger context I can attest that sometimes is fun for a casual encounter. I would suggest looking at other sites though if you are looking for a playmate. Fetlife or adult friend finder will work. This site is more oriented to Real relationships where...

This happens a lot with us. I think real sees about every episode of game of thrones twice. My general advice re: metamour issues is to take a breath and repeat inside my head that I have a separate and secure relationship with real. Then I look at everything from the outside ( as if I...

Dagferi...your post made snort! :)

That was my first question too. I know I wouldn't take well to my meta breaking in on a relationship conversation I was having with real. And lady and I get along. Of course I'd be more pissed at real for having poor boundaries. But I would also want very little to do with a meta who questions...

Text reading is a more common practice in swinger relationship where the outside partner is really a sex object. I'm all for things being out in the open but blanket access to all my communication would feel very violating to me. I would need to have that change if I were to continue in a...

I've also really enjoyed this thread. It's helpful me to read the discussion on marks. I'm not into any BDSM so they mess with me when lady has them on various levels. As she and I are not currently trying to date I just let it go. But it's nice to see all the perspectives and hold those views...

I agree that v configurations seem more stable. Lady and real and I flirt with a triad style but overall being more vee ish seems to be our more stable default.

My first poly experience was a MMW v in college. My boyfriend lived with his partner and I spent weekends there. We are all still close. The v disintegrated after college when we chose various life paths. Marc the hinge is now in another MMW v where he, his wife, and boyfriend Co parent...

How beautiful! Congrats.