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Nope, they've been poly since they got married 20 years ago 🙃 I'm relatively new to poly, going on about a year and a half now, though. And also thanks for the heads up! Wasn't sure if it was allowed or not!

Yes, he acknowledged that, and also said that this situation made him realize that Betty has him "trained" to answer the phone when she calls. But I told him that it was a boundary for me from now on, if it happens again, now that he knows that it is 100% not okay with me. As an...

I'm pretty sure she wouldn't have known, she tends to stay in their shared bedroom after getting home. Since this is the first big hiccup we've had, I'm willing to continue dating him and see how it goes for a bit but if things keep happening like this I will reevaluate.

An update: Phil got a chance to call and we hashed it out. He acknowledged that even right after he answered, he realized he messed up and he wasn't surprised when I said it made me feel like I wasnt being prioritized. He apologized a lot and when I said that going forward I would need this as...

No there's a ton of bedrooms and we were in his.

I think this was what I started coming to realize last night. I will have to lay it all out there and make my needs crystal clear. We've communicated what we want before but this was something I never even considered when we talked everything through.

This is the part I totally fritzed out on too. I have a kid, and in my head, if my coparent called, they are an adult that can deal with a kid emergency for a couple minutes until I can call them back. Phil and Betty don't have kids, but I think Phil is so attentive to Betty that he has assumed...

Hi There, I'm a solo poly woman in my 30s. For about 3 months I've been dating a man in his 40s. Let's call him Phil. Phil is married to Betty, who I've come to see as a friend during our kitchen-table-style poly get-togethers. Yesterday, during intimacy, Betty (not knowing Phil and I had...