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ref2018, your posts have been unhelpful and unfriendly, so I'm not replying to them any more.

The family engine.. Seinneann, With all the respect, you are a feminist, right? I believe your interpretation of my situation is being highly influenced by related preconceptions, which I can't change. Hence I'll refrain from any discussion with you about boundaries and abuse. By the way my...

Making things cool... Seinneann, Thanks for explaining why did you present such critics, but that's not what's going on. No... What I said had a totally different meaning. I never said polyamory is good for her, that I know better, nor that believing in monogamy is wrong. When I said...

Prisoner of the mind... Let me clarify this. Here is the argument and counter-argument: Me: we'll either remain unfulfilled or it will get even worse Her: it will either improve or it will end, so we won't remain unhappy I said she was wrong because this is just simple logic, and this logic...

Crossing boundaries ? Seinneann, Could you explain precisely what do you think I did, or may do, that disrespects her boundaries? Few days ago she congratulated me for the exact opposite, for having respected what she is willing or not to accept between me and Cam, during the water park. Does...

Hey ref2018, the single question that powerpuffgrl1969 did was answered and I didn't mean to make any case against her. Just hoping I could help her find the source of that anger. I don't quite understand why. That request reminds me more of an "court of justice" than a support board. Anyway...

powerpuffgrl1969, I'm not offended, but I must note that it is contradictory to post again reaffirming that you are done with it. And it seems like an angry post. So, sorry if I'm being intrusive with what I'll say, but IMO stakes are high that in some relationship of your past (or present) you...

Actions, not words... GalaGirl, Thanks for your analysis. Let me provide further details. My wife's words I posted were in response to some arguments I had just used with her about our future together. In summary, I said our relationship was already worn out and this tended to get worse in...

I do need help in the original topic "How to invite your wife into polyamory ?", regarding any arguments I can use or actions I can do. GallaGirl, yes I know you had good intentions. northhome, you are welcome to share your wisdom. Yet if you believe it is not possible then I'll still continue...

She says.... Here is what my wife has written to me (I have translated it into English). It came in response for some audio messages I left for her (it is too hard to have a normal conversation so sometimes a walkies-talkie communication works better): The only thing I learn from this message...

I feel vilified... GalaGirl, Thanks for your big effort in trying to make things clear. Though many of your highlights are not precise and I feel very vilified by such interpretation. Thus I'll try to clarify. First, I am not expecting any advice on my wife's disorder form this board. This...

I miss the mating seasons... Tinwen, Let me clarify, I did grieve relationships for very long periods in the past, even being very depressed for months. Though after the grieving comes the gradual giving-up, then the anger for being unfairly humiliated and rejected for so long, quickly...

How it begun... Hi Tinwen, Thanks for your acknowledgments and for the links. In monogamy you must have "ended" one relationship before engaging in another. Thus if you don't want to be single, you must do a "replacement" and I believe it would be hypocrisy to say otherwise. While the "ended"...

kdt26417, Thanks ! Yes, my wife and Cam's mother. Though Cam doesn't have any disorder. She is just very shy and does little social engagement. She says she is happy in doing entertainment all by herself or with internet groups of strangers, but I can see through it that she just needs to feel...

Happy end ... and everything went well ! After rainy Saturday plans were re-scheduled for Sunday, we all re-met in the water park with all the kids and everyone loved it. Cam was surprisingly expressive in stating that she has loved it. My wife also expressed great happiness and satisfaction...

Control ? mostlymonogamish, I never said I'm "healing" Cam. Just said that she has been more social. And I didn't say this is my work either. She is the author of her own success, reached through means of other people, were I'm just am arm for her. Now what do you mean with "fantasies of...

Proven facts are more important. AlwaysGrowing, You're welcome to give me head pointers if you wish. You'll feel more comfortable after I clarify some miss-understandings: I never cheated. When I met Cam, my wife had left home, was living apart and we were not even talking by phone. In past...

acceptance is key cbfalcon, It may be hard to deal with the difference, but the worst thing is to feel unaccepted. Is that the case? If so, then I believe things can improve after each one of you gets to understand the concerns, principles and beliefs of each other. In such, she would explain...

Target: joy anamikanon, fair enough, I'll just agree/disagree. ;) Hi Tinwen, I took some time to think about your remarks before replying. You said you were making your best effort not to make judgments, but your questions were not rendered out of curiosity but from the desire of showing I'm...

All you wanna know Hey Tinwen, Thanks for your questions. I believe my previous posts has answered some of them and I'll reinforce. It is true that my wife has taken some steps under pressure and that wasn't productive, but she also took little steps from free will and those were fulfilling...