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I am downed today. Bad mental health day. As I am doing a lot of the time, I am recovering to go to work. Blah. Oh well, part of the cyclical nature of mental health management and poly management has taught me that you have to accept many things as they are and try to make the best of them. A...

Thats how I feel! Like, really?? That is so weird to me. I mean to each their own but I just keep bumping into them. Thank you.

The vast majority of people I personally know practice the family or what I call family type poly - the type where all of the paramours and metamours are expected to know one another and at least nominally get along. I dont mean family as in everyone has kids/lives together etc. I tend to be the...

I pretty much want the three C's of poly (communication, communication, communication - heh) but only with my partners/loves. I don't mind and often like meeting metamours but it's not at all a requirement for me and I don't enjoy being put into a "veto power" position. I feel that anyone I...

I find I get a lot of flack for the type of poly I practice. I don't tend toward "family style" or attempting to blend my family with my or my husband's loves and I don't desire that type of relationship. I tend to be a with hub multiple individual lines/spokes coming out from me to others...

I had a big problem with this years ago when my husband and I were mono-poly because so many people who were simply cheating were attempting to ID as mono-poly. *sigh* Words mean things.

I actually wouldn't know how to handle that situation and would be a bit uncomfy advising anyone regarding exactly how to break up with someone.

To each their own but I'd at least make sure you had that Very spelled out conversation with her. Also re having the conversation I think someone else said you could point her to this thread. You totally could!

It makes sense but it doesn't make your feelings less valid or less necessary to address. Also, have a I read something wrong? Are you your gf's secret as in "a secret from her husband?"

Maybe you can't. Maybe you're needy. Maybe that's ok. ;) (It certainly should be if that's who you are. And, if it is, and she can't satisfy that, then she can't but You have to figure that out and come to terms with that). I personally do not find it helpful to schedule "let's talk"...

I meant more like this stuff, and in these words: Those things at least seem to present problems AND ways to resolve them. It sucks that you are in pain right now and I know I'm probably more analytical than most people prefer but sometimes people state things less concretely than they think...

Have you had this conversation, in these exact words, with her yet?

I think my question would be: what's your contact/disclosure arrangement. For instance, in my relationship, if he were being the messy hinge it would be his responsibility to fix it. Our arrangement doesn't have me talking with the gf a lot. I suppose I could stick my foot in but it would likely...

I am also Really tired. But later I have to do some Advanced Professional Dress-up (trying on and putting together outfits for work so when I get up at the crack of dawn, I don't have to think). Other than that: movies? and exploring this place more.

I've felt "wired for poly" since before I knew what relationships were. I definitely think it's a thing that can happen and seems to happen often.

I'm open with my friends and select family members. I used to be open at work because I had a workplace that was friendly to anyone. I now work a job where they Say they are friendly to every life-style but don't support anyone different. That's not a battle I want to fight. I feel that picking...

Long distance relationships benefit greatly from structure. Sometimes this develops organically but I've found it is better when all parties decide on some sort of structure. Don't worry if you like things to develop organically - other structure Will develop organically but if you give it some...

To each their own, but it is my hard-won experience that taking someone at face value when they say something is extremely important. If that person, ultimately, lets you down only then do you know your trust was misplaced. Attempting to decide what their actions mean versus what they've said...

I feel I should post here first but I'm not great at these things when first typing them so I will likely edit later! ;) I've been polyamorous in an emotional sense since before I can remember. That was difficult. I've been polysexual since I was sexually active. (I don't always separate those...