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The Pope on gay adoption And this today.... http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/12/29/pope-francis-gay-adoption_n_4516304.html

You know, I think you may be on to something with the relationship anarchy aspects of it all. She does seem to fit that paradigm with the exception of our shared partner. She NEEDS him though for day to day stuff and relies on him a whole lot. But even that could fit into that sort of model...

As much as I'd appreciate sweeping changes, changing church doctrine will take time and if he rushes things, he'll de-stabilize the whole system. Slow and steady... and I think he's heading that way. Hoping, hoping.

I can't wait to see how they reply to that aspect. I've never understood how "socialism" got co-opted/re-framed by the religious/fundamentalist right as a bad or unpatriotic thing. I just DON'T get it. And I have yet to hear somebody explain it without tripping over their own logic and doctrine.

She's a good communicator in the sense that she's good at sharing what she's feeling. What she's not as good at is listening, or picking up on others when things are wrong. That is a tall order to fill though. I think what it comes down to is that her life is very simple and low stress. Our...

I saw a demographic assessment of Catholicism worldwide recently and from the looks of the gaps in membership, he is trying to reach out to young people who are the most disengaged segment of the demographic. They are joining in lower numbers and are not attending church. Given that, he has to...

I'd be speculating at her motivations. I get the feeling that she likes the "idea" of poly more than she actually likes multiple relationships. We are in a traid of sorts and our other partner has other partners. I think she has been feeling like she is missing out somehow, but really doesn't...

I would have no objections to a hijacking. Organic conversations are JUST fine. Having said that, I tried to have a conversation with a certain woman today, but she stood me up again. Hmph!

Ha! The coincidences. I would say that you are far more courageous than I am. I was raised by one LDS parent, in a similar region of the country. We have decided that discussion of religion and politics is essentially off the table. I will respond to this piece first. "Pope Francis seems...

Thanks Emm. A new tool to learn how to use. Wheeeeee!

Oh MY! Popping corn and staying tuned for the outcome of that one. Please update, Kevin.

London, just to clarify: I have never stayed in such a situation. I've walked away every time. By the time this sort of damage has occurred, it is usually a foregone conclusion. You are correct. A relationship (in my experience) can't survive this sort of toxicity. Sometimes though, there...

Is there a tool that you've all used to make your diagrams?

I wonder if "veto" is more common for people newer to poly as a means of maintaining some control over the pace of it all. Like I said, I don't exercise veto in my relationships and I don't really care for the term. But...if somebody I'm seeing is with somebody toxic, then I will make the...

I think what it amounts to is that this particular individual wants a relationship in theory, but not in practice. I'd be speculating as to why she engaged me in the first place and I really don't want to put words in her mouth without being certain. A conversation is in order and needed. But...

I agree, London. It's for this reason that my two current partners don't do hierarchical poly. My husband describes it as "each relationship standing or falling on its own," so it's not really prioritizing the marriage above other relationships either. But there is, at times, overlap when one...

Yes, I agree. I have been the "girlfriend" in that dynamic. In my relationship, I have found that attempts to take on new relationships while existing relationships are in a period of instability results in huge problems. I got "dumped" out of a triad once with a married couple because they...

While it is the role of the moderators to look for egregious violations, it is our individual responsibility to take ownership in this community. I simply am stating that I wish for a community with a greater sense of grace and kindness. I get enough hostility *out there* when often put in...

The right thing? I hesitate with the use of such language. It implies that I know enough about any given dynamic to have all the answers. I don't have that kind of hubris. And that sort of communication will only shut the OP down. An open dialogue requires some grace and humility. People can't...

Thank you. I think one of my relationships is winding down. But yes, I'm enjoying a cup of tea and a book. And I think I only used two real expletives (privately, of course), so yay!