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So I've jumped into the deep end of the pool. Last night I set up a date. It's with a friend/ex-ish. We never really had the ability to do a full relationship with each other. There are too many things missing for it to truly work in its own right but we have always had great affection for each...

Polymath... I love it. Yeah, 2 is less than 3. And Poly Guy just feels safer for me. He has also reached out to me personally during this transition, so that helps as well. Continuing to hang in there... SeaSing

Thanks! As I said, I was surprised I handled it was well as I did. I guess the unknown is scarier than the reality. There's still a lot of ground to cover, but it feels just a bit less overwhelming today. On a selfish note, it would be easier for me if it was only one guy to adjust to. At...

Ok, so huge step for me today. I could tell something has been a little off with my girlfriend. After a year and a half I can sense her emotional state. It took a while to get the conversation going, but she finally opened up. She was trying to respect my need to go slow and not force me to...

Thanks. I actually worked a lot through the stages of grief four years ago when my relationship of almost seven years ended. Knowing the stages and letting myself grieve was important but it only gave me a road map of what might happen and how to deal with it. It still was very devastating...

It doesn't seem to be about "willingness" here. But about "ability" to execute well and if required, ability to handle a break up without "devastation." Actually, seeing how you express it makes me feel a bit better. It's not in my skill set as of right now. I am willing to make this work to...

GalaGirl, thanks for the links! I'm working through them now. Lots of information to digest, but good info. I'm grateful to you for sharing them.

I guess I have less worry about a guy stealing her away as much as undermining our relationship. I have a lot of faith in her. Less so in other men in general. Of course, I feel a lot less stress over the guy she has feelings for that is already poly. It's the other guy I have some concerns...

SouthernGal, thanks! It helps to hear. I know she's worth the risk. It's still just a bit new and scary.

bookbug, again, I'm not talking straight logic. But let me thread the needle of my thought process just a bit for you. It's not that I couldn't lose her in a "closed" relationship. My past experiences have proven my ability to become single. My fear comes from inviting someone into what feels...

"But before all that you could figure out what YOU are" But I think there lies the crux of my problem. I'm NOT sure if I'm cut out for a Polyamorous relationship or not. It's not been something I've aspired to. I know a lot of our views are shaped by experiences and society around us and I'm...

I was trying not to post a novel but in doing so left out important details. While I was gone she developed feelings for two different guys. One she's known for years and is apart of a poly relationship. I'm afraid for agree to including others into her life that I will mean less. Or that...

I'm new here. In fact I'm new to poly in general. It wasn't really my choice, but it has come up a lot in the last handful of years for me. I was very closed to the idea four years ago when my girlfriend at the time brought up to me. Now, I don't think it would have worked with her regardless...