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I think that there is no need to think that holding some relationships to be more important than others is detrimental in any way. I mean, our behavior already proves that this is the case. What I think is important is that how you come to value relationships is as autonomous as possible. I...

So I just went through this whole thread and a few other in the forum that have to do with relationship anarchy. The reasons for this are varied, first and foremost, after reading the introducing posts, it helped me make sense of a mode of approaching relationships that at some points became...

Tinwen, I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who feels those things! I guess that there are many reasons for why I am drawn to polyamory. Reading the vignettes in the sticky, I really appreciate how people can build networks of caring, loving emotions and thoughts. I also appreciate how you...

Hey Spork, I understand how affirming that love is a choice presents that flip-side, where it can be used argumentatively to make people feel guilty if they haven't don't feel X or Y, given how we "choose love". I guess what I mean is that, while there are some fundamental feelings that are...

Huh. Very interesting thread. And very intersting to see all the takes on the notion of "romance". A few thoughts: I think that love is a choice. Of course, there is a certain "something" which provides the foundation for that choice to be made, and this changes from person to person, but as...

Hello, I just broke up with my partner of 2+ years. We had spoken about both being curious about open relationships and/or poly. Unfortunately, the relationship between us as people was fraught with difficulties. The relationship became abusive and eventually, I believe that the desire to move...

Just wanted to chip in and say that I really appreciate the replies. As someone who has issues with perceiving myself as anxious or needy, it hs really opened my eyes to honoring my needs and being able to communicate them, be proud of them and look for people who are compatible with them. I...

Hey, thanks for the reply. The reason why I said that it was a decision that we made together has to do with the fact that for a really long time everything was phrased as "our room", "our tattoo studio", " our house", whenever I would go back home she would ask me to stay, and I did ask her...

Hi, I am going through a difficult moment but I don't know anyone who knows about poly to even start giving me advice about what to do. This is a longish story but I'll do my best to cut it short. Me (m/25) and J (f/25), been in a closed relationship for a little over two years, opening up has...

Hey everyone, this is my first time in a community like this :P Very recently, a couple of months, I started seeing this girl. Everything has been rather unexpected and there is a sense of spontaneity to it that is rather nice. After a series of long mono relatinships, I've found myself in a...