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  1. S

    Why and how did you get into poly?

    I'm new to it, myself. I opened to the possibility because my late husband did not meet all of my needs. He was unable to accept the concept of an open relationship, and I ended up cheating on him a couple of times, and felt bad that I couldn't be honest with him about needing a single evening...
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    US Poly Laws or, Where are all the poly friendly places?

    The brown hills happen in Oregon any time there are no trees. But I found the answer to everyone's questions, legal-wise. Here's the site. http://usmarriagelaws.com/search/united_states/polygamy/ And here's the answer -- All 50 states have statutes against bigamy (multiple licensed...
  3. S

    US Poly Laws or, Where are all the poly friendly places?

    Actually, I was deeply disappointed when I moved to the pacific northwest. (Oregon) I was anticipating rain, fog, mist, cool temperatures and verdant forest. Instead what I got was sun, dust, and brown, brown hills all summer -- which lasted well into October. Warm temperatures, sunny beaches...
  4. S

    Not jealous, but frustrated

    It's complicated. But yes, we've tried. *shrug* It is what it is. Thanks.
  5. S

    US Poly Laws or, Where are all the poly friendly places?

    The climate in the pacific northwest is changing a bit, becoming hotter and dryer in the summer. But otherwise, it's quite a nice place, environment-wise. I know a lot of poly people out here, but I haven't found a handle on what the actual laws are.
  6. S

    Well I said it!

    Actually, yes, that happens. You see why I love him?
  7. S

    Not jealous, but frustrated

    Thanks. That is a point. It's my coping mechanism when I don't get something -- including myself. You should have seen my research on postpartum depression! Not everyone thinks like that, and while part of me feels like they'd find life easier if they did, not everyone finds knowledge...
  8. S

    US Poly Laws or, Where are all the poly friendly places?

    Okay, all these laws on the books, do any of them address the concept of people living in separate cabins or yurts around a big house? Because technically, no matter who is sleeping with whom, it doesn't look like a "marriage-like cohabitation" when investigated by the law. And if it does...
  9. S

    Not jealous, but frustrated

    Actually, that's incredibly good advice, and was what my husband was originally PLANNING on doing when he started spending time with Sweetie. Unfortunately, she literally climbed into his lap crying (pheremones are demons, aren't they?) getting him very attached, unbeknownst to me, and then I...
  10. S

    Dilemma

    I'm a huge believer in research. Opening Up, by Tristan Taormino, and Sex at Dawn, by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jetha have been godsends since my husband fell in love. I found The Ethical Slut a little too in-your-face for my taste, but the expert I went and talked to recommended it, too.
  11. S

    New to poly and relationship woes (I would love to get feedback)

    You know, I can't comment as applies specifically to polyamory, but from a practical, basic level, I can say a few things: On the speed of relationships: they do take as long as they take. Sometimes (shockingly) that time is only a few months. Sometimes it takes years. Assuming that...
  12. S

    Well I said it!

    And the really cute thing is, now all I have to do is say, "God dammit," at him in any situation, with the right look on my face, and he blushes BRIGHT pink. "Well, god dammit!" *pink!*
  13. S

    Not jealous, but frustrated

    We don't, and we aren't. And I already said I wasn't expecting anything of the kind, if you read above. I wasn't asking about how to change her behavior -- that's hers. I was asking how I, personally, am supposed to deal with it. Not expecting her to change, or do something different. And as...
  14. S

    Not jealous, but frustrated

    My husband's is in early love with a new girl -- (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=70180) and the grieving process I went through is pretty much over with, (my husband being uncannily supportive) but now I have a new problem. She's ambivalent, and I am so losing patience with...
  15. S

    Well I said it!

    My husband was asleep when he first told me. "I do, I love you," he said with his eyes closed, followed by, "God dammit." An hour or so later, after he'd woken up and we made love, I asked him, "So, were you awake when you said, I love you, or..." and he interrupted me with, "I SAID WHAT?!?" I...
  16. S

    Am I being too kind?

    x
  17. S

    Is Poly different from other people

    Sounds lucky. Challenges aside, congratulations.
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