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    Highly sensitive person and poly

    I am curious if anyone here can speak to being a highly sensitive person practicing polyamory? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Highly_sensitive_person Discovering that I am an HSP was really eye-opening for me, in a similar way to realizing that I am poly. It helps to explain a lot of...
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    Worried that I might not be cut out for this.

    I have been in a poly relationship for a year, and I still get a bit jealous and weird feelings sometimes when my partner talks about others that he is dating or finds attractive. My feelings about it depend a lot on the situation - if we are on a date and I feel like he isn't being very...
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    Newly Poly Single

    When I was more single (I still consider myself solo-ish poly, even though I am currently living with a partner) I was casually dating 2 people around the same time. As I started to fall in love the other relationship really fizzled out, because I was SOO into the other guy I wanted to focus my...
  4. O

    Newly Poly Single

    I have a 4 year old and very much disagree with this. Of course children take an enormous amount of time and energy, but I don't find it anymore challenging to do now as a Relationship Anarchist than I did as someone in a traditionally monogamous marriage. Actually, now it is easier in many ways...
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    Newcomer equality: the opposite of couple privilege

    As far as I am concerned, being able to solve problems as an equal with your partner and negotiate your relationship is a fundamental part of any decent relationship. People who have this view are often referred to as non-hierarchal. Because why would someone use the word secondary except to...
  6. O

    Dealing with resentment

    Thank so much for your thoughtful reply! Yes, he knows it is very stressful for me. But his response is along the lines of "I'm sorry this is hard/stressful/hurtful" and then he feels a ton of guilt for his part in it, but it doesn't actually seem to affect his decision making or...
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    Dealing with resentment

    I have been with my boyfriend for a year and some major life and relationship changes for us lately have revealed that I have a great deal of built up resentment, towards him and his (now ex) partner. He is my first poly relationship after ending my marriage, and going into it I thought it...
  8. O

    New poly relationship - both of us new to poly - being open, caring & ethical

    He doesn't *have* to share it with me at all (well, except sex with someone new that might put me at a greater risk of STIs, before we have sex again, for consent reasons.) Its just something easy for us to share with one another in the spirit of full disclosure. We usually tell one another if...
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    Navigating Early Stages of Poly Dating

    It sounds like guys who just haven't been all that interested, which doesn't mean you have done anything wrong. But at least in my experience if a guy is romantically really into me, they are pretty obvious about it. And I tend to like guys who are somewhat more demonstrative, communicative, and...
  10. O

    Seeking Montanans for possible story on my new website

    Howdy, I am from Montana. Feel free to message me!
  11. O

    New poly relationship - both of us new to poly - being open, caring & ethical

    It is really great you are thinking in detail about these things in advance. It is great to have a really solid idea of what your partner wants/needs/expects to know about your other relationships. I always tell people I am going on dates with or interested about being poly, explicitly, right...
  12. O

    PLEASE HELP! New to this and need some advice

    When I first started dating my boyfriend (who is my married) he didn't text/call me nearly as much as I am used to a new bf communicating with me. And it wasn't that he was lukewarm about me or our relationship, there was SOO much NRE between us, but I didn't get the amount of...
  13. O

    He's just not that into me, but since when?

    I think I would just be really blunt, in a friendly way. "I like hanging out with you and find you very attractive. Are you interested in a romantic or sexual relationship with me, or do you feel more platonic?" Or even if you are sitting and watching a show together and he isn't being flirty...
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    Comparisons!

    I know that my boyfriend "compares" his wife and I sometimes, but I don't feel judged by it. Like he'll make offhanded comments about how I am more affectionate, or how she needs more alone time, or likes certain sexual positions more with one or the other of us. Generally it doesn't bother me...
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    Working triad?

    Keep in mind that most monogamous relationships don't last forever either. Or even if they do last an entire lifetime, that doesn't mean that the people in the couple are happy or fulfilled. Length of time in a relationship is not the same thing as a successful relationship. I think its good...
  16. O

    Polyamory and Segregation of Relationships

    Feelings and memories of other relationships (not just romantic ones) are always popping into my head! And it's not a bad thing at all, to recall things like - oh that reminds me of this thing my mom said, or the last time I was at this restaurant with so-and-so I spilled wine all over myself...
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    Open Relationships - Principles vs Practice.

    Lol, the kicker in my current relationship (and my first poly relationship!) is that I even asked on the first date if they had rules, and the answer I got was basically "Nah, we don't really have rules" Then I learn AFTER we have sex, that oh-yeah-I-think-I-should-mention that I can't perform...
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    How Common is My Story and How Do I Support My Partners With It?

    NRE for me is also extremely intense Although, pretty rare. I have had several relationships where I have "grown in love" and several where I think I could have fallen really hard but it never really worked out because they didn't reciprocate, but when they do and it becomes that cycle of being...
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    Poly Vignettes: Sharing Success & Happiness

    Although my intro to poly has been super challenging and emotionally exhausting and sometimes feels impossible... I have had some really lovely moments lately. My metamor (my boyfriend's wife) came up with a really cute nickname for me the other day. They have cute pet names for one another...
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    Open Relationships - Principles vs Practice.

    I think you're taking some really positive steps and trying to deal with your issues constructively. Women on dating sites get just bombarded with attention really, and I can hardly even begin to filter through all the messages I get. And turns out the most "sucessful" date I had was with the...
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