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Well, actually, I do, and judging from a lot of the chat on the forum so do others- especially when it comes to the 'structures' bit. How we organise our relationships is constantly discussed and a technical language has evolved to aid us in that discussion- V, hinge, quad etc. 'Function' is...

I don't suppose you could provide us with a few more details, especially for those of us who don't have a Mechanical Turk account and wouldn't otherwise sign up for one? In particular, is this a university study? And how/where will it be reported? /Adam

The milk chocolate Lindor does it for me- a couple of squares of them makes me happy any time. Personally I think it's Lindt's best creation. More locally I have more than a passing fondness for Cadbury's Black Forest and a native brand, Whittakers, and their dark peppermint creme chocolate is...

And add me to the list of people who are inviting you to rethink the relationship. Clearly you have a sense of ethics, and you are compromising that code. There are essentially one of three roads ahead of you: Either reflect on this circumstance and, if appropriate and genuine, change your...

I am a big, big proponent of keeping life as simple as possible. I think if you are going to attempt to sexually turn his world around with poly, it sounds like you will have more than enough on your plate without turning it upside down as well. Keep the exploration of his sexuality for a much...

Hi OnceAndFuture Yep, Scarfies we were. Dunedin is an excellent city, and certainly when I was growing up NZ music was dominated by the 'Dunedin Sound'. The Clean, the Verlaines, Straight Jacket Fits, Tall Dwarfs, Jean-Paul Satre Experience were all staples of the age. If you haven't already...

I see things slightly differently. Its easier to cope with negative feelings if you have a salve for the wounds. For many people, coping with their partner being with someone else is easier if they themselves have a relationship. Often, the feeling of being left out or isolated is the root of...

Hi Colbywest It almost sounds like you want an affair rather than move your marriage in a poly direction. If nothing else, poly is about starting a new relationship within marriage and all the ramifications of that. One of the things that occurs to me in passing is that Poly implies that...

witch

One of the newspapers here ran a story on falling asleep in 60secs using a breathing technique. I haven't tried it myself, but here it is http://www.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=11444015 If you try it out I would be interested to hear how it goes. /Adam

I gotta ask, what do you play? /Adam

Shaft

Hi Mags Yep, I sure do read Evie's blog :) It took me a bit of while to come onto the forum, and one of the reasons is because I know from past experiences that you sometimes need to have a place to vent. Both of us being here makes ranting, blowing off steam, or even just being (deliberately...

Cooper

doors

Hi Magdlyn, its nice to meet you too. I have gone back and looked at some of your previous posts and have thoroughly enjoyed reading them. And yeah, I enjoy Biblical criticism. Its an interesting and fascinating area of study. I never expected to be discussing it on this forum though... /Adam

And 'Gomer' means 'Completion'', which adds to the metaphoric/symbolic dimension to the story. Well, one could argue that a story of a woman having many lovers but a faithful husband could be a parable for Israel "whoring after strange gods" but still retaining the love of Yahweh, which in...

Certainly always seeking self-pleasure to the exclusion of your partners needs and desires is not an indication of a loving, sharing, and intimate relationship, but sex is a multifaceted experience that is not kept in a static emotional or physical space. As our moods change, so do our desires...

I would have thought that teaching in particular would have resonated within the community. After all, jealousy, resentment, and all the other little nastinesses of the psyche that rise up and bite us stem from attachment to our SO. If we were content to allow things to unfold as they will...

As an aside, a couple of years ago I read a study which showed that a disproportionate number of academics are either Buddhists or secular Buddhists (at least in Australasian universities). The authors conjectured that in part it was because Buddhism's innate rationality and non-dependence on...