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Satisfying for me a satisfying level of intimacy would be if someone can trust me and share vulnerable things, and actually listen if I'm doing the same. Reasonable amount of time? maybe a few months? maybe a few months? it could be longer if things seem to be moving that way.

After many years of struggling to reconcile monogamy with multiple sexual attractions and desire for more close relationships in general, I entered my first poly relationship 3 years ago. That relationship started out feeling very secure, but because of expectations related to that partner...