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So I know that things seem to be Doom and Gloom with the posts that I've had, so I figured I needed to brighten it up a bit. Just the other day, my wife had done several things, small, large, whatever, I can't go into details about all of it...that reinforced the fact that she loves me, and...

I will have to decline on talking specifics about this, as it is in the realm of things that are inappropriate to discuss, but, we have this under control.

Thank you everyone for the assessments. We talked a little about it, and she just needed some time to herself, I was being overly attentive and wasn't giving her enough breathing room...but it's all good now.

Now, that all said. I perhaps spoke too soon. She came home, and had to go to bed because her headache was back with a vengeance...but not before expressing to me that she was sorry for the evening. Now I feel like an ass. I jumped to conclusions that were probably wrong.

Yes, she expressed that she needed what I was providing. Point taken. I guess in a way I'd expect better response after this long. I get that a decade of neglect can't be fixed in 5 months. I don't resent her... it's more that I'm concerned that the things I'm doing that's she's asked me to...

This past week, my wife was gone with her other friend for 2 nights, camping a state away. I haven't had a whole ton of time to spend with her since she got back...we had a few hours here and there, but her friend has also taken up time by both being here, and having her on the phone for hours...

Points taken. My wife my not feel that she's poly, but it sure seems that way to me. Yes, I hate labeling things...maybe my words on my posts weren't the greatest (seems to be a systematic problem with me). I really don't know what to name what we have, but I recognize that poly could be so...

Clarity I have done some serious soul searching. Something that has helped give me clarity in all of this is a quote from "A Personal Tao" that I keep reminding myself of when things get difficult: I'll just leave that at that.

Are we still compatible in marriage? That remains to be seen. Our first thoughts are, yes, we are. But, at the same time, we have already discussed what to do if either of us feels that we are not: Amicably separate. I/we don't see that happening, but we are both aware that it could happen...

GalaGirl - thank you for that thoughtful post. Let me take some time to address some of the things you brought up (see my last post as well, as I think that will explain some things too). This was my rule, which she agreed to without fuss. I don't think she wanted to fall in love with anyone...

Thank you for the links. I will check them out.

Let me add some additional context, in response to the last couple of responses, and maybe that will add some additional helpful information, I was going to explain some of this in a later post, but since it's come up now, I'll address some things: Yes, our marriage did/does need work. We did...

Yes., yes, and yes. I have done my best to revert myself back to the days when we first met. Letting go of societal norms of what I should be as the breadwinner...giving her the time and attention she deserves, and needs. It's only been a few short(?) 5 months or so since I've...

Part 2 Alrighty...so, as promised, here is the next part of my story. Bear with me, it's probably terrible to read. I'll try and categorize things to make reading easier...maybe. Is it Really Polyamory? I had an interestingly short discussion with my wife the other night. She doesn't...

Thanks everyone for the replies so far. I've got a lot of reading to do, and will definitely post a "Part 2" like I promised, as soon as I gather all my thoughts in some form of logical fashion.

Hello everyone. I've been directed to this site by someone I just started talking to, and I finally decided to go ahead and make a post of my own. My wife and I have been married for 14 years now. We have 2 children, a teenager, and one slightly-less older than that. From the beginning, even...