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    Common courtesy or controlling?

    You seem like you already know the answer to this one. Quality time is important to you in a relationship and you should advocate for that. Instead of focusing in your partner's behavior, I recommend addressing the underlying issue - which could be any number of things, including: -An issue of...
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    When and how to tell your crush you're poly

    out at work I'm comfortable being out at work and it's really not risky to date a coworker in my particular work environment. Even if we dated and things ended, I don't think it would be awkward. The people I work with are open about their personal lives and relationships, and I've openly...
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    When and how to tell your crush you're poly

    Alright, here's the situation. I'm in an open relationship (with, my friend, J) and we're egalitarian poly / RA(ish). and I have a huge crush on my new coworker, X. I'm a straight woman and so far I know he is single and straight (via Facebook). We have only worked 2 shifts together and I just...
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    Was this unethical?

    I agree with this post 100% I also want to point out that even though he broke an agreement, he was honest with you about it. So what you've learned about your partner is a) the closed relationship structure wasn't working for him and b) you can probably trust him to be honest with you. Yes...
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    when is sex, 'sex'?

    My definition Sex: consensual genital or anal stimulation exchanged between people in the pursuit of pleasure. This covers any act that stimulates someone's vulva/vagina, penis/testicles, or anus wether it's with a hand, mouth, or other genitals (aside from masterbation). I believe that any...
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    Radical best friends with benefits?

    more stuff As my first post on here, I'm really surprised by how much discussion this has brought up. It's awesome! I want to add some things. on the topic of inevitable attraction between 2 friends that are each other's preferred gender/sex: I am straight, and the friend I'm talking about is...
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    Feeling Hidden...

    To me, it sounds like the three of you need to talk. I agree with what people are saying about the power dynamic: that your meta is trying to control the visibility of your relationship with your partner - something that belongs to you and not your meta directly. Secondary relationships can...
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    Radical best friends with benefits?

    So I'm not particularly new to ethical non-monogamy, but I am new to self identifying as poly and learning more about ENM/poly culture and relationship dynamics. I've read the ethical slut and more than two, and I've listened to several hours worth of polyweekly podcast and I've been reading a...
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    Am I doing polyamory wrong?

    First off, I think a lot of the previous responses contain some AWESOME advice. Right off the bat this sounds like jealousy to me. Nothing you shared leads me to believe that you are being unethical or "doing poly wrong". If he really wants to embrace polyamory, he may have a hard time...
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    Cuddling With Friends - & Non-sexual Intimacy

    I love having intimate friends that I can platonically cuddle with! I've found that I benefit a lot from physical touch in a lot forms that don't have to be sexual- hugging, cuddling, massage, having my hair played with. I don't have many friends like this because it's not super common. As a...
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    Advice on Boundaries for a new poly couple

    First off, I agree with GalaGirl's advice about boundaries. Your boundaries are about what YOU will and won't do (as opposed to being about what other people do). Think about your boundaries and write them down. It's your responsibility to state your boundaries and stand by them. If you feel...
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    Partner is Monogamous

    I'm in a very similar situation and I don't have any solid answers about wether or not you it's a good idea to continue but I have some informed advice. I'm going to talk about my situation and refer to my monogamous-identified partner as M. -a good relationship needs to come from a place of...
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    Advice on Boundaries for a new poly couple

    First off, I agree with GalaGirl's advice about boundaries. Your boundaries are about what YOU will and won't do (as opposed to being about what other people do). Think about your boundaries and write them down. It's your responsibility to state your boundaries and stand by them. If you feel...
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