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This whole situation sounds like a trainwreck. I can't imagine it will be a very positive experience for the OP, beside the learning that will (hopefully) come with it. The wife is controlling and manipulating using shame tactics for OP use of porn, masturbation and looking at other women...and...

Hello there! I'm in a stable but stagnant marriage of ten years--but with a history of repeated "emotional affairs." I have come to the point where I no longer want to suppress my feelings simply to please society or my wife. I want to live in my emotions. I want to carry out my love adventures...