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It sounds like the word "lifestyle" has been irredeemably polluted for you for a variety of reasons. When you see the word lifestyle, you seem to imagine someone sneering "I don't approve of your lifestyle." Ok, fair enough. I find the way that some of the long-term members of this forum pile...

Is derailing every thread where the OP foolishly deployed the word "lifestyle" into an argument about the semantics of the word "lifestyle" a lifestyle? :rolleyes:

A couple questions might help bring the situation into focus: When you express how you're feeling about this to your wife, how does she respond? Is she sympathetic to how you feel, or does she treat your feelings as more like an obstacle to her happiness? Are you getting anything positive out...

A word nerd's hot take: Polyamory is, literally, a lifestyle. There's such a thing as specialization, where a word's meaning narrows over time in popular usage. An example is "doctor", which originally referred to a teacher (and is still used as an honorific for those who acquire certain...

Have you thought through (and talked through) what happens if you do get romantically attached to someone, and your wife wants you to end the relationship? It's better to consider the possibility while it's hypothetical than to be blindsided by it actually happening.

From https://www.askzeta.com/zeta-piermont-account-agreement (Generally speaking, an America-based financial startup is gonna have a long ways to go to operate in other countries. Regulation be buggin' 😂)

It's not ALL about just pining for Maple, btw: I had a nice first date tonight—reckon I'll see this person again—and have another first date a week from now. Aaaand a second date the weekend after that. So I am gradually meeting new, poly people, and taking things slowly feels good. So there's...

Pining a lot tonight for a relationship what's gone. Maybe the anniversary effect? It's almost exactly a year since our first date, after all. Probably that, then. For the occasion, this song's lyrics accurately summarize how I feel:

Anyway, welcome to the forum.

This is sooooo damn relatable. 😂❤️ Congrats on making some plans!

Not a lot of report over the past couple weeks. Got a trip coming up—it is the equivalent trip to the one I took immediately after my first date with Maple, so we'll see how many "anniversary effect" sad feelings I get. Hey, hopefully not too many, it would be nice to be truly moving on given...

You: I don't want to have a threesome at all. Him: I expect you to have a threesome if you want to keep being in a relationship with me. You: ...uhhhh, fuck. Ok. Fine. I'd like it to be with someone I don't know, I'd be most comfortable with that. Him: No, I want you to be comfy, so ask one of...

Everyone involved is allowed to have wants and needs, including you. If they want you to "batch" your questions for times when you're all together, ok, that's what they want. You want some support and reassurance, it sounds like, to alleviate your anxiety. So if you agree to hold off on...

What I just read was: Your pregnant wife's lifelong best friend lives with you. She has never had a sexual relationship before, ever. You and she are starting to flirt with each other. Your wife is not interested in having a non-monogamous relationship, from the sounds of it. Is that accurate...

If I'm reading this correctly, your new partner of 2–3 months has trouble sleeping and experiences separation anxiety when you aren't around. Is that correct? Leaving polyamory aside for a moment, that is not healthy adult behaviour. You said this is #2's first relationship, and, fair enough...

Welcome. I'm sorry you and your bear are so frustrated. 😂 I hope you find what you're looking for!

As Evie said, it would help to know more about precisely what values you hold that may/may not be at odds with polyamory. "Conservative values" could mean practically anything, though I assume you are focused on "my conservative values emphasize a traditional family structure and often view...

I've heard you tell this story several times, and it's lovely. That "slow burn", gradually developing relationship sounds really nice. I haven't experienced it, but I think I'd like it as an alternative to the all-or-nothing of typical dating, where I feel we're each trying to assess "Do I like...

I have an opinion you might dislike, and I'm not an accredited relationship expert, anyway, but here it is: Almost everyone develops feelings for people outside of their monogamous relationships. It's extremely common and natural. This doesn't really give you any information about whether or...

"mono-centric people" and "poly folks" aren't two distinct cultures that developed on different continents in isolation from each other; we're mostly all products of the same influences. So why is it surprising many polyamorous people feel similarly to many monogamous people about marriage...