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Thank you for the advice. I particularly resonate with the idea of dating each other. I've been talking about just this quality time issue as a need for me already, so I'm hopeful that setting up some dates will help even me out emotionally.

I'm in a poly relationship with my wife of 16 years. I'm basically mono, free to date but not terribly interested, whereas she has a steady girlfriend (a very nice lady with experience in alternative relationships and poly in particular). They've been together about six months. Before that...