Recent content by Cannotthinkofausername

Yeah, I am 110% not secure. Given that they used to regularly compare me to their better in bed partners during sex, and would actually stop noticing my reactions when they did that. I kind of feel I am the crappy substitute for an actual sex partner, that I am a human fleshlight. That's not...

No, not at all. Just a dream. I just found it almost humorous how clear it was. No need for the dream dictionary to interpret that one.

Mostlymonogamish- woke up from a bad dream (about this) this morning and read your post and your hugs made a big difference. I know, I know, melodramatic, but I don't control my dreams and I really am quite foolishly stressed by all of this. Dreamt I was asked out on a date by him, really...

Lunabunny- he says otherwise, he says that he was just not-present, having difficulty putting life down etc. He goes to a lot of effort to try and make me feel attractive. Given that he moved the phone so as to keep me out of sight I think my view is more likely to be correct. And given that he...

Also just reiterating that ye are all getting only my side of the story, it's one-sided, I am the one who is a bit sensitive so it probably is all a bit overblown and dramatic-sounding etc. I know this myself. And I don't want to be reacting unreasonably because of my body image stuff. So I tend...

I don't see any contradiction between the two? Like if you are on your phone during sex- hard not to think that is because you are bored. Having something boring to look at is going to contribute to that, and blocking that view might help. He says it is not because he was bored and not because I...

He doesn't shame me for having emotions. He also doesn't turn things into a big hoo ha so much as it sometimes needs one to get him to notice. He keeps agreements if he thinks thry are important, to me or him. And he wasn't trying to evade responsibility but expressing regret at having held me...

The touching thing only happened during or before comparing. He wasn't trying to be mean, just happy about the other partners and unintentionally forgetting about me- I was a kind of prop and he wanted to share about the exciting stuff rather than engage with the old unshiny partner (NRE or...

I did at that time. I said that I would not try to control what he did, but I was not comfortable texting other partners when with him and vice versa, that it seemed disrespectful and that I wanted to be present with the person I was with- and that I would prefer he stop sex to deal with...

Part of my problem with this is that I was the first one to have other partners. But he had forgotten about one agreement and unilaterally decided to break the other when he engaged in other relationships. Stuff which I had had to hold to. While it is understandable that he would initially want...

So having a discussion with my partner the other day I mentioned I would text one of my other partners when I got home. He was surprised and said "Oh hey, text him now, why would you wait?" I was going to wait because the partner I was physically present with had outlined previously to me...

It really sounds like she is lonely and wants a friend. If you are happy to just be friends, if you are happy to have a completely non-sexual or non-romantic relationship, then do that. If not, then don't hold on hoping that she will want you. She has given you some very clear signals that she...

So we discussed it and he has stopped doing it. It took him a little while- he started trying to compensate by comparing with things that were favorable to me, which was still not okay (not unfavorable to other partners, just 'these are these things I like about you' etc). But that seems to...

I can guarantee you that this guy is not someone who would be deliberately cruel like that, either poking me or being focused on being hurtful. Not a chance. Not to me, not to anyone. I think he's just literally not thinking about why this is a sensitive subject for me, at all. Just about why...

This is not the case. We have been going out for a fair amount of time, he has never done anything like this before. He is always sweet, kind, considerate, excellent at talking about consent and about feelings. That's sort of why I feel he must be just a bit bored of me, coupled with NRE...